Survivor: Cagayan Episode 1 - Part 2

Hot Girl With a Grudge

By Jim Van Nest, Survivor Analyst

March 1, 2014

Poker players everywhere are embarrassed by you.

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ANYway...Tasha is very frustrated that she is not able to actually play the game. She tells Garrett that she wants to talk to him and Spencer and he refuses. He says he doesn't want to do that anymore. "So quit!!!" Exactly, Tasha. Exactly. We head to break with Tasha telling us that this is Survivor and if you don't want to play the game, get out of here! I agree with the young lady from the 314!

When we return from break, J'Tia tells us that her tribe has decided that she's going home. What's funny is that she actually seems surprised by this. She is one of the few Survivors ever that has had a quantifiable negative impact on her tribe. Her tribe literally, not figuratively or exaggeratedly, would be in better shape if she had never been there. Think about that for a second. In 28 seasons, have we ever been able to say this about a player in such definite terms? As more talking happens around the fire, Garrett is still trying to defend his "no side convos" policy and J'Tia is getting more and more sarcastic and ignorant. Spencer tells us about Garrett's open forum and what a moronic thing it was to do. He says that now they have to babysit the girls to make sure nothing changes. Fade to Tasha starting a talk with Kass about how they can change up the game. In the middle of Tasha's sales pitch, Garrett and Spencer come down to see what's up, leaving J'Tia alone at camp. Kass is real quick to say something about leaving her alone up there and who knows what she'll do. Garrett is such an idiot that he wants the four of them to all stay together.


Meanwhile up around the campfire, J'Tia is channeling Brandon Hantz and pours the full pot of rice onto the fire. Like, the whole thing. Are you frickin' kidding me? What kind of psycho idiot do you have to be to pull a stunt like this? You are one of the worst Survivors of all time. And you're pissed because you're going home? Here's an idea, solve a puzzle. Do something useful. Now, you've destroyed the food source of your entire tribe. At exactly the same time as your girl is trying to figure out a way to save your sorry ass! Amazing! The worst part is she starts telling us about it and laughing like it's the funniest thing ever. No remorse. No nothing.

As the group comes back to camp, Kass notices the rice and asks who poured it on the fire. J'Tia says she has no idea. What's really amazing here is the fact that no one seems too angry about it. Almost as if it was expected. Um, really? How are they not losing their mind right now? I just got word that Phillip Sheppard just kicked J'Tia out of Stealth R Us! How are these people saying nothing? Hell, Kass even looks at Garrett as if it's partially his fault for leaving J'Tia alone? Are you serious? Kass does ask a good question about what the criteria for "Brain" is in this game. At this point, it appears to be anything but. She also tells us that she was planning on coming up to turn the game around with J'Tia, but she can't align with someone who'd pour the rice out.

Continued:       1       2       3       4       5       6



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