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Hello, good people. Before we begin, I just want you to know that I am now what is known as a free agent. I can't be tied down to just one readership. I have to choose the readership that's best for me. Maybe it's you...maybe it's not. Of course, it doesn't matter, because I have an idol anyway. So how about that?!?!?! This sounds ridiculous, I know. Every bit as ridiculous as my latest whipping boy, Ozzy, sounded last week as he whined his way through another episode. But don't despair, he got a sandwich and took a swim, he feels all better now and Savaii is one big happy family.

Upolu, on the other hand, is a house divided. There's Coach's side and Not Coach's side. They went back and forth over whether to keep Coach's lackey, Edna or someone who can help the tribe win challenges (despite the fact that she really kinda hasn't), Mikayla. At Tribal, Coach got someone named Rick (he has a mustache) to vote with him and Mikayla was sent to Redemption Island to face off with Christine.

The questions of the day seem to be: will Christine finally get knocked off Redemption Island? Will Coach and Albert be able to hug it out and continue on as a unified tribe? Will Ozzy decide to go to Redemption Island because he just doesn't want to play with these kids anymore? And will Brandon EVER learn to just keep his mouth shut? If I was a betting man, I'd put my money on "Yes, No, Yes, Hell No."

Survivor: South Pacific Power Rankings

Coach - 6-1. Coach remains in the top slot, but it's shaky. He took his stand last week and won. So with Brandon and Edna very much in his pocket, he's voting for three. But will this cause a rift in the tribe that causes more challenge losses? Will he be able to reconcile with Albert and keep a strong alliance? We'll probably learn some of that tonight.

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