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Hello, good people. After months (that seemed longer) of waiting, the best reality television show ever is back. Welcome to Survivor: Millennials vs. Gen X!! This is, amazingly, the 33rd season of Survivor and they're trying a new theme. We're separating the tribes along generational lines. As I said in my previews, I'm not a fan of this. I think there is plenty of drama in every season without a need to label the tribes. But, as with most Survivor seasons, if the cast is good, the show will be good. If they're not, it won't. On my first glance, the cast has a lot of potential to give us a great season.

We're back in Fiji for the first time since Season 14 and we have 20 people vying for the title of Sole Survivor and the $1 million that comes with it. With that in mind, we'll have to have some double eliminations along the way to fit that many people into the confines of a typical season. We've been promised twists and turns. We've been promised weather and we've been promised series "firsts". We're also getting a 90 minute premiere tonight, so hopefully we'll get to know some of these people before the first episode is over. I don't really have much of an intro here as I'm just ready to get to the show. So without further ado, let's hit the tagline. Thirty-nine days, 20 people, one Survivor!

The show begins with some amazingly beautiful shots of several of the islands of Fiji. Over these shots, Jeff tells us that the players do not yet know the theme of the season. We meet a couple of the Millennials first - a snowboard instructor, a video game player and Zeke - who hates Twitter, despite being ON Twitter. We meet a couple Gen Xers - an attorney, a mom with a sweet Minnesota accent and a TV writer who doesn't think young people would put in much time to get what they want. I don't care what anyone tells me, this theme is being strongly forced. These people HAD to have been asked the most leading questions. This is not starting out well for me.

Once we get an abbreviated theme song, the boats make it to the beach and Jeff has them draw for buffs. Once all of the orange and purple has been distributed, he breaks the news to them. It's a generational war - Millennials vs. Gen X. I wonder if they couldn't have already figured out their tribal breakdown - considering everyone with an orange buff is wearing some kind of shade of red, orange or pink, while everyone on the purple tribe seems to be wearing blue. Way to keep THAT a secret, Jeff. Right off the bat, Jeff asks if anyone wants to cop to being the youngest player. Will raises his hand and gets a huge cheer for leaving high school to play Survivor. Um...what? Anyway, Jeff asks who is the oldest on the Gen X tribe. Paul raises his hand and then right off the bat starts complaining about the whole "everyone gets a trophy." As a born right in the heart of Gen X (born in 1970) - if I have to hear about the trophy thing one more time, I'm gonna find a litter of kittens and beat them all with my son's Pinewood Derby participation trophy. Get the eff over it already. By the way, this is a record for "how fast can Survivor or someone on Survivor piss me off."

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