Survivor: Caramoan - Finale (Part 2)

The Last Push

By Ben Willoughby

May 14, 2013

Cochran has never touched this many lady parts before.

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Cochran talks about how I developed this sociopathic ability to separate the game and emotion” and that “beyond this game I’m willing to prove my gratitude to you." As for why Brenda should vote for him, “You were a threat to my game and I took out a threat to my game. And that’s really the core of the game... It’s cold but I think it’s the truth.” Survivor: rewarding sociopaths since 2000!

Brenda to Dawn. Brenda talks about how strong her connection was with Dawn and how her vote hurt more than Cochran’s and Sherri’s. “I saw you at the most vulnerable state ever." She recaps about the retainer and how Dawn said she would leave the game and Brenda convinced her to stay. You said, “‘I owe you everything, I’m in this game because of you, Brenda.' I realized after, I had Dawn’s fate in the game in my hands. Would you really have given it up if you didn’t have your teeth back? Something cosmetic.” “No. I wouldn’t have,” says Dawn.

It’s not quite enough for Brenda, who wants Dawn to take out her teeth. Dawn says she is not going to do that but Brenda insists. “I had your fate in my hand that day, and you’re saying, ‘I would have stayed. It wasn’t a big deal.' If you’re telling me that ‘I’m strong, I’m a fighter’ then prove it to me right now."

Dawn accepts that she will have to do it, and talks at length about how she’s going to do it. Brenda is all “let’s do it, let’s do it” and Dawn is “I’m going to, I’m going to." Eventually Dawn does it and then bares the gap in her bottom teeth, which was quickly screen-captured and put all over the internet. “I wanted you to feel that because it’s kind of what I felt, a little bit heartbreaking,” Brenda says.

Well, that was uncomfortable for everyone. I realize that Brenda wants something personal from Dawn. But at the same time, I’m not sure exactly what she was expecting to get. Brenda certainly wasn’t going to get the emotional catharsis she felt she needed, no matter what was said or how much Dawn humiliated herself.

That ends the proceedings. Time to cast the million dollar votes!


Phillip votes for Cochran. He’s very proud of him and thanks him for joining Stealth R Us. We don’t see Malcolm’s vote, but he says “this is not the name I thought I’d be writing down tonight” As we’ve only seen one vote and it’s for Cochran, we all know how this will end up. Even Phillip’s original season, Season 22, Redemption Island, teased us with the incredibly distant possibility that Rob might actually lose to Phillip.

However, Probst says while he’d like to read the votes right here, everyone will have to wait almost a year for the result. Then he walks out manfully like Cochran after an immunity challenge with the voting urn tucked under his arm. Presumably, everyone left behind compares notes.

But look! Here’s Probst coming into the well-forested auditorium of CBS Studio Center in Studio City, Los Angeles! “Let’s get to this!” he says before blathering on about how anyone could win this game. Sherri, the millionaire who no one likes! Dawn, the hyper-paranoid rider of the emotional roller-coaster who no one respects! Cochran, the easily-sunburnt fish out of water who has had a hipster make-over sometime in the last year!

Sherri admits that the odds of winning are not good. Cochran is confident, but preparing for the worst. Dawn doesn’t think she can win the million, but should win enough to buy some new teeth.

Probst reads the votes. Cochran. Cochran. Cochran. Cochran. Cochran. Clean sweep. Cochran is the Ultimate Survivor, and all his wet dreams have come true! Cochran’s life is all downhill from here! He hugs Dawn, then Sherri, then goes down to see his family. There’s Cochran’s mom, and grandma, and his Dad who is not wearing sunglasses even though he’s in Hollywood!

Probst declares that Cochran is the most unlikely winner every, and then says we will hear from him, Brenda, Dawn and soap star heartthrob Malcolm. As well as Boston Rob, Rudy and Richard Hatch, because this season didn’t have enough interesting people!

Stay tuned for the reunion recap!

Continued:       1       2       3       4       5       6       7       8



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