Survivor: Philippines - Episode 12

Shot Into Smithereens

By Ben Willoughby

December 6, 2012

No one told me there was going to be math and stuff.

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Previously on Survivor, Abi won immunity and came up with a "crazy scheme" involving a fake immunity idol, and Jonathan and his goofy battered hat were voted out. Six are left. Who will be voted out tonight?

Bats! The castaways arrive back at camp after Night 30’s Tribal Council. Abi says that it’s clear that “there is a foursome alliance going on." Well, Jonathan spelled it out earlier that evening so I’d say that’s pretty clear. Abi goes to talk with the only other person outside of that alliance. “I don’t know, I’m not really thinking about it right now,” he says. I’m not sure if Carter’s really not thinking about it, or if he just doesn’t want to talk with Abi. Either is plausible.

In interview, Abi repeats her meme that the reason everyone has issues with her is because she is too honest. Ha ha ha.

Meanwhile, Lisa is talking with Malcolm about Tribal Council. Lisa interviews that Tribal Council was a really tough decision, and that Malcolm is playing a brilliant game on all levels – and she lists them. Strategic, likeable, underdog, good in challenges. Hey, let’s give Malcolm the million dollars now. That would show his mom! Denise then butters Lisa up by saying how proud she is of her for standing up for herself and not backing down. Lisa says that going to the end with Malcolm and Denise "is not a great strategy" but that "betraying that trust opposes who I am."




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After the commercial... Probst sighting! Reward challenge! Come on in, guys! It’s a little early, but I suppose I should be grateful the editors decided not to fill empty space with footage of Abi moping around camp. And in this reward challenge, Probst announces, each castaway will be paired up with a loved one.

Here’s Michael’s son, Michael! Who does Michael think he is, George Foreman? Michael is just as excited about this news as you would think. “The greatest human being I know,” is how Michael describes his son. “I learned everything from him,” says Michael Jr., confirming that no matter what Michael thinks, Michael Jr. is really just a big dope.

Now it’s time for Carter’s mother Bianca! She jumps right on top of him and he has to catch her. Carter breaks down immediately, and has to explain that this never happens. And here’s Denise’s husband, Brad. Denise jumps in his arms and starts bawling. “I’m so snotty and sticky,” she tells him in what might not be their most romantic moment. “Can I borrow your shirt?” Brad does not give it up.

Here’s Lisa’s brother Justice! Unfortunately his evil twin sister Tyranny was unavailable. Lisa is speechless. The only sound she can make is like Ben Stiller’s crying after he got Mary back together with Brett Favre. Lisa is not an attractive crier. “I don’t think I’ve needed any person more in my life in this moment... Isn’t he beautiful?” she asks. Probst agrees that Justice is “a good-looking kid."


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