Survivor: South Pacific

I Need Redemption

By Jim Van Nest, Survivor Analyst

September 19, 2011

Yeah, I got voted off but Ozzy thought I was hot. That's how Amanda Kimmel got (somewhat) famous.

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To find out which tribe will get Ozzy and which will get Coach, they have to choose eggs filled with paint. With one quick squeeze, Coach busts his egg to reveal blue paint. After three slaps to his chest, Ozzy finally busts his egg spraying red paint all over his shirt. Cochran is thrilled to have Ozzy on his tribe. He's a huge Ozzy fan. The cowboy, Rick, is not at all thrilled to see Coach on his Tribe. He is not impressed by the Dragon Slayer and mentions something about him being in his forties. Which brings me to a quick Writer's Aside here: I don't really do these anymore, but I feel it's necessary to point this out. Coach is actually NOT in his 40s. He is actually 39-years old. I only mention this because yesterday, Sunday, September 18th, was Coach's 40th birthday. I only mention THIS because Sunday, September 18th happens to be the birthday of BOP's very own David Mumpower. As I know he still holds Coach solely responsible for ruining at least one full season of the show, I think it's incredibly hilarious to find out that not only do they share a birthday, but that Coach is younger. So, Happy Birthday, David (and Coach).

With a quick swipe of red paint all over Jeff's shirt, Ozzy is welcomed into his tribe as a returning hero, while Coach is damn near shunned as he heads to his team's mat. Basically, this is Boston Rob vs Russell all over again. The difference here is that Ozzy isn't half the player Rob is. Can't wait to see what he's learned since his last game.

Right off the bat, it's time for a challenge. Ozzy vs. Coach. They'll start by scaling a 12 foot pole to retrieve a small turtle. They'll then have to dig under a log, to make their war to another Survivor puzzle. The puzzle is a pyramid puzzle that you need to move from one position to another (with one in between), but you can only move one piece at a time and a bigger piece can never be on top of a smaller piece. Once the puzzle is moved with the turtle on top, the winner will receive a basket full of taro root and flint for fire. Survivors ready? Go.


As we've seen in reruns, Ozzy can scale this pole like no one’s business. But amazingly enough, Coach keeps right with him. They're neck and neck as they dig under the log. Ozzy being a bit smaller, he's able to get under the log first, but Coach is not very far behind. Ozzy's at the puzzle for about 45 seconds or so, but that doesn't matter as he's completely lost in this challenge. Both players seem to be having trouble with the rules and the strategy to solve it. The red tribe, Savaii, seems to have done this kind of puzzle before as they are giving Ozzy very detailed, perfect instructions for how to solve this. The blue tribe, Upolu, is shouting out instructions, but it becomes quite clear that they have no idea how to solve this puzzle. As you would expect, Ozzy wins easily, though it really was a win for Savaii. As they cheer and embrace, Coach is looked at with disdain for losing, despite the fact that the chucklenuts on his tribe had him working in circles. I guess we see how this is gonna go.

As Coach packs up to leave, only one person stays behind to help him. Edna, the business suit clad lady who was afraid of Russell, lags behind and gives Coach a hand gathering his things. Coach finally has a smile and tells us that this was a big kick in the ass; he's staring at going home first.

Continued:       1       2       3       4       5       6       7       8



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