Survivor: Game Changers Recap

The Tables Have Turned

By David Mumpower and Kim Hollis

March 27, 2017

The game just got 85% less interesting.

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The first half of the challenge requires a delicate balance as a player carries a ball precariously sitting on a tall stick. As they keep it from falling, they must navigate an obstacle course. Each completed leg means that another piece gets added to the stick, making its balance that much trickier. After watching it in action for a moment, we wonder why more women didn’t participate.

Ozzy finishes first, of course. Whatever steroids he took prior to the season are really paying dividends. As expected, JT reaches his teammate second, with Tai way behind. The poor guy just cannot keep his stick straight. If only Caleb were still there. Ahem.

The second half of the challenge would be right in Brad Culpepper’s wheelhouse. He was an NFL player, after all. All he’d have to do is throw sandbags to knock down objects several feet away. Unfortunately for him, Tai leaves him at such a disadvantage that both of his opponents are literally 80 percent finished by the time he starts. What we learn from this is that Brad Culpepper throws an angry sandbag. As he furiously takes out his Tai-based frustration on thin air, Malcolm wins the challenge…but then something incredible happens.

Troyzan starts to miss, just as Culpepper shows why he played in the NFL for nine years. He simply doesn’t miss, negating Troyzan’s lead in the blink of an eye. Seriously, Culpepper closes the full gap in about 20 seconds. Troyzan starts to panic, making desperation throws. As the other Survivors look on in awe, Culpepper ties and then overtakes his opponent, eventually earning second place for his team.


Basically, Culpepper did the entirety of his part of the challenge so fast that Troyzan knocked over none of his remaining sticks during that timeframe. HE ONLY NEEDED TWO MORE! He’d already done eight. It was an insurmountable lead that Culpepper just surmounted. The only bright side to this humiliation for Tavua is that they’re only out iced coffee. Still, Cirie makes sure to remind everyone that he’s odd man out on the tribe. Little does she know that he’s the only person in the game with an immunity idol. That’s a lot better than iced coffee.

The next segment is Zen Ozzy. Survivor loves to show him fishing, and he loves to brag about what a great provider he is for his tribe. We wonder if Ozzy has put two and two together that this provision has never aided him in winning the show in three previous tries, but hey! Ozzy did appear on Playboy Channel’s Foursome; maybe four’s his lucky number. He certainly did get lucky on Foursome. Right on cue, Ozzy catches a stingray, which he presents to the tribe. Andrea is thrilled that…Ozzy exists.

At Nuku, they’re enjoying their coffee and cookies. Sandra again takes this opportunity to tell the camera that she’s still the queen. We’re torn about her bragging. On the one hand, she’s right. .On the other hand, what we just said about arrogance above applies to even her, the greatest player of all-time. Cut to…JT and Malcolm are talking about getting rid of Sandra. JT mentions that Sandra knows she’s in charge, which she does. The two alpha males have proven compatible in challenges, and they seem like great allies in the game. Alas, the simple fact that they just mentioned writing down Sandra’s name means that they’re probably screwed.

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