Survivor: Caramoan - Reunion

By Ben Willoughby

May 15, 2013

One of these players is good at Survivor. Hint: Not the one on the right.

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“Is there going to be a friendship with Dawn? Time has gone by for Brenda, she says unconvincingly, though having it shown on TV again has brought these issues up again. “But I’m still feeling it... I feel like I lost a friend and then gained one,” but ultimately she accepts the apology. Anyway, Brenda also had big news. She is via satellite because she is having a baby any day now.

After a commercial break, we get to hear from Phillip. Probst says he’s a polarizing figure, but according to Phillip “Everyone is digging the way I played this season.” Malcolm cracks up at this blatant lie. But apparently, people even run into Phillip on the street and invite him to watch Survivor in their house? This is so unconvincing that there’s photographic evidence, and there doesn’t seem to be use of Photoshop or a hostage situation, so I guess it’s true. Though they are in Hollywood, where paid actors are cheap. I’m not sure what’s more surprising – that people actually invite Phillip into their home, or that Phillip has nothing better to do. Oh wait, I know which is more surprising.

And Stealth R Us has been expanding. There are now over 2000 members, each with a name given to them by Phillip. He even inducts Probst into Stealth R Us. His name is Piercing Eagle. “Soaring from above, arising above the fray, and coming in with a question that is piercing and on point."

We’re not quite done with Phillip, because we are treated to a montage of Phillip sucking up to his “mentor” Boston Rob and going through the BR Rules. And Boston Rob is in the audience! What does he think of this “nice gesture?"


“I’ll just start by saying Phillip is one of the most entertaining characters this show has ever seen,” says Boston Rob, who is still playing along with Phillip even though his season is over and he won. Of course he is. Phillip mentions Boston Rob more than Probst does. He says to Phillip, “I personally was flattered beyond belief that you chose to emulate your game on mine, Of course, if we’re being honest, you had a little bit of trouble with the execution, but when all is said and done I’m proud of you.”

But that’s still not all! The master has learned from the student! Boston Rob has followed Phillip the Specialist into the glamorous world of self-publishing! He has a new e-book, the Boston Rob Rulebook, which lists “the strategies with which I live my life” and Phillip should use it if CBS calls again. He gives the first copy of the book to Phillip.

By the way, if you’re wondering about Phillip’s own book The Costa Rica Job and whether it’s for you, here’s a paragraph that should tell you all you need to know:

“We grabbed each other, to prevent either one of us from reaching the gun. He also tried wrenching the HK36 from my back. In response, I made every effort to rip his throat out. He screamed and tried to thumb-gouge my eye, but it ended up in my mouth and I bit down on it mercilessly… and began punching his groin viciously as well – it was that kind of death fight.” Cochran, future writer, is scribbling down notes.

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