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Survivor: Caramoan - Episode 2

Honey Badger

By Ben Willoughby

February 21, 2013

Oh, four is *less* than six!

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Previously on Survivor, ten “fans” pitted themselves against ten “favorites” from seasons past, who we all remember and recognize. Sure we do. The “favorites” got off to a quick start by winning an immediate reward challenge, and alliances were formed – with the four prettiest “fans” joining to form the pretty alliance, while among the “favorites” Phillip launched Stealth R Us 2.0. And Francesca was voted out first, which – let’s face it – is pretty funny. I think that tops Matt being sent to Redemption Island a second time.

The mood is pretty glum as the favorites return to camp. Dawn approaches Brandon and does the whole “I understand you’re upset” thing. Brandon is having none of it, claiming that making Francesca be the first person voted out twice was the harshest thing he’s ever seen in his life. It’s like he never watched any of Russell’s seasons. But he claims to be totally “honey badger”.

Dawn asks Brandon to have compassion for both sides, and Brandon informs her that she is going to lose based on her and Cochran’s move to vote for Francesca, and that’s what he’ll have compassion about. Dawn feels that Brandon was awful to her, and she has to walk away and find a spot on the beach to cry. She interviews that she tries so hard not to disrespect people, and her brain cannot process it when someone does it to her. She says that it doesn’t matter to her what Brandon thinks, but if “he treats other people like that, it’s like pollution."

It’s hard to side with Brandon over Dawn, especially with the pollution part, but based on what we’ve seen so far I think Dawn is taking this way too personally. Brandon didn’t say anything mean that we saw - and I’m assuming Survivor would have been only too happy to show us if he did. Essentially what he said was “Voting out Francesca was harsh” and “You’re going to lose because of it." Just because Brandon doesn’t want to sing “Kumbaya” with you is no reason to break down.




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Now Brandon is talking with Erik, who looks amused. Brandon says he is feeling fed up and revengeful, and he is thinking of going Russell Hantz on these [expletive deleteds] right now. In interview Brandon “feels my uncle’s blood running through my body. It’s like a wave... it feels great!” Brandon decides to make camp life so miserable that it would make Uncle Russell look like a little [expletive deleted]. Like Uncle Russell needs Brandon’s help with that.

Brandon promises that he is “playing dirrrty to the core” and that “I want to go out with a bang." That’s it for the big explosion? I’ve said this before, but Next Time on Survivor, you have lied to me for the last time!

On the morning of Day 4, we wake up with the “fans”. Everyone’s working away, except for Shamar, who I was expecting to be all Gunnery Sergeant Hartman, but is instead lying down in the shelter. Shamar tells us that he is “conserving energy” and that this is a great strategy because he won’t be fighting with anyone and that if people see him not caring about the game, no one will see him as a threat. Meanwhile, at least two of the interchangeable blondes talk about voting Shamar out.


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