Top Chef: Texas Recap

By David Mumpower

November 30, 2011

He could win the hell out of Top Tattoo, though...unless Michael Voltaggio was in the competition.

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The contestants are all over the place on this one. After being informed that picking a chili with a higher Scoville Score will net them more money, several still determine to play it safe. Beverly picks Anaheim Chili, which is so mild it would only net $500 if she wins; its Scoville Score is about the same as mustard, I guess. Beverly isn’t even going to cook it, which means the Future Top Chef Champion has missed the whole point of this challenge. Moto Chris informs us (too proudly) that his stomach has issues with spicy foods. My brother! (Did I say that too proudly?) Heather takes on a Thai Chili that would net her $10,000, meaning that she has her head in the game.

Chuy selects Habanero Chili, informing us that it is his spice of choice at home. This is the second straight episode where a challenge was right in Chuy’s wheelhouse. The fact that he hasn’t set the world on fire thus far is problematic in that other chefs operating outside their comfort levels are doing just as well if not better. Homefield advantage ain’t all it’s cracked up to be.

The only chef who goes for it is Paul Qui, who selects the Ghost Chili. I think this is the pepper Homer Simpson ate before he went on a spiritual journey guided by Johnny Cash’s voice. Now thatsa spicey meatball. It also pays $20,000 if he wins. That would be slightly better than Beverly’s $500, which wouldn’t even buy her a decent iPad.




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The judges include former Top Chef Masters contestants/Two Hot Tamales celebrity chefs Mary Sue Milliken and Susan Feniger, the latter of whom was clearly against the idea of this challenge. She worries about the number of spices she will ingest and has that “I regret everything!” look throughout the judging. As expected, they bury Beverly for not cooking a chili, Moto Richie for making his sauce too sweet, and Chuy for overpowering his chilies with canned tomatoes.

The head of the class for this challenge includes Heather for her Thai Chili (worth $10,000 if she wins), Grayson for perfectly balancing the habanero with a lime sauce (worth $12,500 if she wins), and Paul for serving molten lava as a flavor (worth $20,000 and a metric ton of respect if he wins). Given Susan’s reluctance to eat anything too spicy, I presumed this choice would come down to Grayson or Heather, either of whom is worthy. To my shock, Paul is chosen due in large part to his bravado for picking the hottest spice.

The elimination challenge today again divides the teams. This time, there are five groups of three. The Red Team is comprised of Moto Chris, Dakota and Whitney. The Black Team is Beverly, Moto Chris and Nyesha. The Green Team is Other Chris, Chuy and Sarah. The Blue Team is Edward, Heather and Paul. And the White Team is Grayson, Lindsay and Ty. Before the teams even speak, Nyesha is shown grousing about her teammates, which is usually Top Chef code for either A) a pleasant surprise winner or B) a disastrous team that winds up throwing someone under the bus. We’ll randomly call that person Keith for the purpose of this discussion. Not that I’m still bitter. Other Chris wins a touch of respect from me when he states his reluctance to work with Sarah given how poorly she behaved with Keith. I’m sayin’!


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