What's Next

By Michael Lynderey

June 14, 2010

These cats are fast as lightning. It's a little bit frightening.

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Studio executives may have taken time off from greenlighting sequels to fire up the barbecue for Memorial Day, but they were back in full force last week - and the results of their return are documented below.

Now, I don't much want to write about the new Cleopatra film, having not actually caught up on the last Cleopatra film, and being totally disinterested in the usual barrage of rumors and speculation that Angelina Jolie will play the title role. Much more terrifying is Tom Cruise's recent threat to expand his Tropic Thunder character, movie mogul Les Grossman, into feature length - but hey, we were faced with the prospect of a Zoolander II just a few months ago, and it doesn't look like they're making that - so there is hope.

Looking more on the bright, summery side: Captain America has been having some fun adding character actors to its roster (Stanley Tucci, Neal McDonough, Tommy Lee Jones), and a few other upcoming Marvel Comics films are inspiring some particularly uninspired rumor-mongering about their potential cast (James McAvoy = Professor X in X-Men 5 is about all that's official at the moment). There was also some nonsense about Guillermo del Toro dropping out of directing one or both of the Hobbit films, but my interest in that particular franchise ended just as the credits for Return of the King did. And while those Hobbits have misplaced their helmer, directors have been getting hired left and right lately for other sequels; namely, Hitman 2 (why?), Journey to the Center of the Earth 2 (oh, dear lord, why?), Clash of the Titans 2 (please, no, no, no) and Final Destination 5 (harumph).


Moving on to 2012 movies - the Battleship game adaptation has now fled from May 25th to May 18th of that year, apparently preferring Madagascar III to Men In Black III when it comes to its choice of which needless three-quel it wants to face up against. On a more urgent note, it looks like wrestler Triple H is getting his own star vehicle, but I sure as sherlock am not going to write about it (but yes, yes, it's one of those movies where he has to supervise a bunch of noisy kids and fight off the gangsters and feed the pet goat...).

Speaking of reprising old plots, Sandra Bullock and Ryan Reynolds are now looking to reteam in a follow-up to The Proposal - not a sequel, but a film that would have them matched up as a U.S. marshal and his prisoner, on the run together while chased by thoroughly unthreatening gangsters. Dedicated movie watchers will know that this very plot has already produced several of the worst movies of recent months (Killers, The Bounty Hunter, Did You Hear About the Morgans?). In fact, it's a little hard to see how Reynolds and Bullock could hope to top the inanity of Bounty Hunter, the total and complete antipathy for comedy of the Morgans, or the absolutely offensive, incomprehensible plot twist delivered at the end of Killers. But it's certainly worth a try.

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