The Amazing Race 13, Episode 9
That Is Studly
By Kim Hollis and David Mumpower
November 23, 2008
Toni & Dallas breeze through the "Boots" competition, saying that the movements feel quite natural to them. They're told to make their way to the town of Zhukovsky, where they will visit a bakery for their next clue. Andrew & Dan have some difficulty donning their military uniforms, which means that Ken & Tina are able to move ahead of them. Team Superbad's footwear problems continue, as Andrew has difficulty putting his boots on correctly. In fact, he worries so much about his appearance that we wonder if he realizes he's not getting ready for his wedding day. At any rate, they decide it would be best to move to the other task, since they know they're ahead of Nick & Starr for the moment and would like to keep it that way.
Whoops! The boys soon realize that it doesn't matter which task they do. They still have to wear the uniform either way. And so they trudge back to the tent to get dressed once again. And as they've committed this stupid mistake, Nick & Starr have gotten dressed and are out starting their march. Once again, clue reading has proven to be their nemesis.
Posted without comment: "We finally figured out our socks."
Now that they're dressed, Team Superbad decides that they might as well go ahead and march. See, Andrew was in marching band, so this should be no trouble. Problem is, Dan was *not* in marching band, and if he had been, he would have promptly been ejected by the other nerds. This is funnier than anything seen in Spies Like Us - and we like Spies Like Us. The Russian officer overseeing this whole thing clearly can't help but wonder how his nation lost the cold war to people like us. Once again, they switch to the "Borscht" task. Their performance has been so embarrassing that we half expect Phil to come out and say, "You know what? You're so awful that we're ending this leg now. You're eliminated."
Toni & Dallas arrive at the bakery, which leads them to the Road Block. The person who chooses to do this task must unload 50 individual 55-pound bags of flour and deliver them to a bakery. Hopefully, it will be an erotic bakery. Once there, the bags must be placed horizontally on the floor. Needless to say, since this task requires some brute force, Dallas is the logical choice here. Ken & Tina arrive later, and Dallas recognizes that former football player Ken will be a formidable opponent. Even though Toni chirps at him that he should try one bag at a time, Dallas is determined that he'll beat Ken and continues with his two bags at once strategy even though the heat is tough and he's getting worn out. Despite the fact that Ken is able to wear down a 14 bag deficit, Dallas finishes the task first, and will probably wind up with about a ten minute lead to the Pit Stop at Neskuchny Sad Park. We're going to be very bitter if there is not an elimination at "Sad" Park.