This Weekend, Read This

By Curt David and Emily Gibson

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You know that feeling when you gather the 32 most famous witches and wizards and watch them start dueling? Yes, that’s the feeling I have right now.

I created the Unofficial Harry Potter Bracket, where I seeded 32 characters from The Harry Potter series. You can see the line-up and read all about that process here.

Note: All of these Harry Potter columns might contain spoilers from the series.

The first four duels have already happened, and I am going to share with you the results here. If you would like to vote for the remaining duels, feel free to follow along on Twitter @himmelberger_c and Instagram @curt_himmelberger.

Also, my dear friend and Harry Potter enthusiast Emily Gibson (FB: emily.gibson.12) has created the dueling stories you’ll see below.

Without further ado, here are the results:

MATCH 1: Who would win in a duel between Dolores Umbridge (2) vs. Viktor Krum (7)?

Dolores Umbridge received 87% of the votes vs. 13% for Viktor Krum, so she moves on to the Sweet 16.

How did the duel go down? Emily explains:

Officials: “Opponents will bow to each other and then attempt to disarm, injure, or kill each other in order to force submission, and thus a winner is decided. On the count of three. One. Tw-”

Umbridge: “Avada Kedavra!”

Match Analysis:

Out of the voters who commented, the number one reason behind voting for Umbridge was her lack of human decency (also described as stop-at-nothing personality, no regard for rules, and some words that cannot be reprinted in this column). The second, albeit similar, reasoning was her sneakiness, conniving, and ability to outwit Krum. The third most popular reason is actually a tie.
The same number of voters predicted that Umbridge would cheat as the number of voters who said Krum’s respectfulness and being a gentleman would be a disadvantage for him in this match.
Umbridge moves on to the Sweet 16 where she will play the winner of Ron Weasley vs. Filius Flitwick.

My conclusion: While a 2 seed usually wins against a 7 seed, I was surprised at how little support Krum received. In some of the other matches, voters were at least hesitant or unsure in their voting before choosing a winner, but Umbridge was the clear winner. I predict that she’ll make it to the Elite 8 and duel Minerva McGonagall.

MATCH 2: Who would win in a duel between Ginny Weasley (3) vs. Rubeus Hagrid (6)?

Ginny Weasley received 82% of the votes vs. 18% for Rubeus Hagrid, so she moves on to the Sweet 16.

How did the duel go down? Emily explains:

Officials: Next up is Ginny Weasley and Rubeus Hagrid!”

Hagrid, “I don't feel comfortable with this.”

Ginny, “I know Hagrid but I can't let my team down!”

Officials, “Bow, and then attempt to disarm, injure, or kill each other in order to force submission, and thus a winner is decided. On the count of three... one, two, three.”

Hagrid, “I forfei…”

Ginny, “Stupefy!”

Match analysis:

Out of the voters who commented, there is a tie for the number one reason behind voting for Ginny Weasley. The number of voters who mentioned her training and experience (Dumbledore’s army, Reductor curse, fought dark wizards at The Ministry of Magic and the Battle of Hogwarts) were equal to the number of voters who chose her because Hagrid has not learned as much or in unpracticed/stinks at magic. The second most popular reason is G. Weasley’s strong personality: being clever, smart, feisty, sticks to her guns, and loyal. And the two reasons that tied for third place is the fact that Hagrid would never hurt a student and the fact that she is a redhead.

The most popular reason for Hagrid to win would be if he was allowed to use magical creatures in the duel. Others noted his large stature and magical resistance in his giant’s blood. One voter also shared with me an extensive reddit theory about Hagrid actually being a Death-eater, which was one of those things that can never be unread once you read it.

Ginny Weasley moves on to the Sweet 16 where she will either duel Severus Snape or Cho Chang.

My conclusion: An interesting note, 40% of the people who voted for G. Weasley either described a positive characteristic of Hagrid or mentioned how tough it was to make this choice, which was not a requirement of the voting process. While of course this shows what a beloved character Hagrid is, I believe this also shows how serious people take their Harry Potter canon, and will even vote logic over their personal desires in the Unofficial Harry Potter Bracket. I predict that G. Weasley will lose to Severus Snape in the next round, but based on the responses today, the match will be closer than we think.




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MATCH 3: Who would win in a duel between Arthur Weasley (4) vs. Lucius Malfoy (5)?

Arthur Weasley received 26% of the votes vs. 74% for Lucius Malfoy, so L. Malfoy moves on to the Sweet 16.

How did the duel go down? Well, L. Malfoy won. But Emily explains how she wished the duel would have went down, since Emily writes her duel stories in the voting rounds before the winner is actually announced:

Officials, “Next up is Arthur Weasley and Lucius Malfoy. Come on up here and bow, and then attempt to disarm, injure, or kill each other in order to force submission, and thus a winner is decided. And we will have no cheating, like in the Umbridge match!”

The crowd cheers and boos.

Lucius Malfoy, “I don’t know what you mean. I only play fair!”

Arthur Weasley, “Don’t worry everyone, I will be fine.”

Officials, “On the count of three. One. Tw-”

Both wands turn green at the same time without anyone saying anything! They are sweating and going in circles. The spells cast. Then Lucius Malfoy is standing over Arthur Weasley. This could be the end! In a blink of an eye, Lucius grabbed his stomach and started throwing up frogs!

Officials, “I don’t know what is going on! Malfoy is now laying on the mat and looks like he will have to forfeit!”

Arthur, “Molly, I just thought of the boys using it on each other and must have cast it without thinking!”

Officials, “Arthur Weasley is the winner!*”

Match analysis:

***But he’s not. Lucius Malfoy won. Out of the voters who commented, the number one reason L. Malfoy wins is because he is going to cheat or play dirty. The second most popular reason was his viciousness and more willingness to hurt people. Conversely, the number one reason that A. Weasley would win is because he would physically beat Lucius, perhaps by punching him.

Lucius Malfoy moves on to the Sweet 16 where he will either duel Minerva McGonagall or Gilderoy Lockhart.

My conclusion: This was the first tournament upset! I was sure that beloved Arthur Weasley would beat Lucius Malfoy, hence the seeding, but Arthur was only able to manage a quarter of the votes. I appreciated how some of the voters’ analysis turned into full-out argumentative research papers.

Multiple voters noted how at first-glance A. Weasley would look like a bumbling idiot trying to figure out muggle objects (the counter-side argument), but then explained how he is actually a trained wizard in the Order who would put up a fight when it counted. I predict that McGonagall will destroy him in the Sweet 16.

MATCH 4: Who would win in a duel between Bellatrix Lestrange (1) vs. Rita Skeeter (8)?

Bellatrix Lestrange received 100% of the votes vs. 0% for Rita Skeeter, so Lestrange moves on to the Sweet 16.

How did the duel go down? Emily explains:

Officials, “Next up is Bellatrix Lestrange and Rita Skeeter.”

Both witches make their way to the stage.

Officials, “Combatants face each other, bow, and then attempt to disarm, injure, or kill each other in order to force submission, and thus a winner is decided.”

They both stare at each other and nod their heads.

“On the count of 3. One, Tw-”

Bellatrix’ wand turns green. She is starting with the killing curse.

Rita...has disappeared!?

Officials, “I am not sure where she has gone or if this is legal?”

Bellatrix, “Where did you go? Are you too scared to fight? Come on out! It won’t hurt, for too long!”

Meanwhile, Rita’s quill is moving non-stop writing everything that is going on.

A bug lands near Bellatrix’s shoe and while throwing a fit about Rita needing to be disqualified, she steps on the bug.

Rita’s quill stops and falls down. Rita appears on the floor where the bug was knocked out.
Officials, “Bellatrix has won!”

Bellatrix is outraged that she didn’t get to properly kill anyone yet.

Match analysis:

Out of the voters who commented, the number one reason behind voting for Lestrange is all the comments like she is ruthless, and will stop at nothing to achieve her goals, is hardcore, a badass, etc. The second most popular reason, very similar to the first, is how she is crazy, unhinged, no morals, and enjoys hurting and torturing others. Coming in third is the basic reason that Rita, while being able to turn into a beetle, is not smart or skilled enough to face Bellatrix.

Lestrange moves onto the Sweet 16 where she will duel either Kingsley Shacklebolt or Cedric Diggory.

My conclusion: I was shocked and excited for the tournament’s first shut-out! While the winner of the match was obvious, you know how there will always be a random Twitter user who chooses the other option in the poll. So the fact that Lestrange scored all the votes proves to me that she’ll be a major contender in this tournament. I predict that she’ll make it to the Final Four, perhaps losing to Hermione Granger at that point.

Stay tuned for the results of the other matches of The Unofficial Harry Potter tournament.


     


 
 

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Thursday, March 28, 2024
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