5 Ways to Prep: The Emoji Movie

By George Rose

July 31, 2017

Even the voice actors don't know what's going on in this scene.

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2) The Angry Birds Movie (2016)

Though this isn’t the best example of an animated movie, this may be the closest comparison we have to an Emoji Movie. The Social Network was a stupid concept that made an amazing movie, but it was about the creation of a website and not a cell phone feature. Angry Birds is a series of cell phone game apps, not exactly a cell phone feature, either. There really isn’t much to compare to a movie about text message icons, but the internet isn’t even 30 years old yet. It still took almost that long to make a good movie about a website. Maybe there should be a movie about the guy/girl who created emojis, but non-flip cell phones are even younger than the internet, and this just all feels too soon. Neither emojis nor Angry Birds are old enough to be nostalgic, and they seem too simple a concept to adapt into feature length films.

That didn’t stop Hollywood from trying, though! The odd thing is… Angry Birds isn’t bad. It’s not Pixar-level quality but, at this point, it doesn’t have to be. I’d rather pay to watch a decent animated 3D movie on the big screen than pay to watch an Oscar caliber war movie that’s utterly boring. Summer is the time to have fun and be with your friends and family. Is there a better way to escape the heat than by sitting in an air conditioned theater, laughing with those around you and watching 3D effects that you can’t get on your TV at home? “I’d rather sit quietly and be bored out of my mind watching people die horrific deaths while we remember that war is horrible as we glorify it at the same time,” said NOBODY EVER! If someone had reminded me last week that movies should be exciting experiences, I would have seen Valerian. This week, I’ll be seeing the Emoji Movie. If you only have time for movies at home, give Angry Birds a shot. It’s a nice origin story for the game we all play and fun for the whole family.


3) The LEGO Movie (2014)

There are no words for how brilliant this movie is. Instead of trying, here is a list of all the trophies it won at the 2015 Nobody Cares What George Has To Say Awards:

Best Non-Pixar Animated Movie
Best Movie About Toys That Everyone Said Was Impossible To Turn Into A Feature Film
Best Performance By Chris Pratt That Doesn’t Show Him Shirtless
Best Comedic Performance By A Batman
Best Surprise Performance By A Human Actor In An Animated Film
Best Reason To Keep Buying LEGOs
Best Movie Ever That Should Have WON The Oscar But Got Snubbed A Nomination

Seriously, I have trouble talking about this movie because it is so incredible and so shocking in how it blew away the low expectations it had before losing out on the Oscar it deserved. I can only imagine how much Disney spent to make sure LEGO lost out on a nomination so Big Hero 6 could steal the win. If Emoji Movie is even half as good the LEGO Movie was, then we are in for a real treat. Heck, even 10% as good as LEGO Movie would be more fun than Dunkirk and that’s why people take a two hour break in their day to watch a movie. For fun.

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