Survivor: Worlds Apart Power Rankings

Week 5

By Ben Willoughby

March 25, 2015

Spoilers: I'm not going to win.

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4. Rodney

Rodney has patched things up with Mike after eating his snake. “Men just being men,” is his rationale. Other Rodney highlights were that he’s a “smooth criminal like Michael Jackson,” which was immediately followed up with “I should spank [Lindsey] like a big baby.” As demonstrated elsewhere this week, Rodney could use a few lessons in phrasing. That way, he wouldn’t go around talking about how hot his 64-year-old mother is. Anyway, I encourage all Boston women to set themselves to a higher standard, by not dating Rodney.

5. Joaquin

As I said above, if the male Blue Collars aren’t total idiots, Joaquin has a good chance of being in with them and making it to the merge. That’s a big if.

6. Joe

We didn’t see a lot of Joe last episode, which is good for Joe, because as the only No Collar on the tribe his job is to lie low, not make waves and quietly build alliances.

7. Tyler

Tyler has the most work to do of anyone on the Escameca. I don’t think he will be able to fit in with the Blue Collars, especially if Joaquin is tight with Rodney. So he’ll have to build alliances with Joe and Sierra, as well as keeping Joaquin allied with him. Tyler had better focus on winning challenges for his tribe.


1. Jenn

Jenn had a good week, finding the hidden immunity idol and then doing a charming interview about whether it is Max or Shirin who is more annoying. It’s getting to the point where she is coasting.


2. Carolyn

Carolyn is always so definite about who she wants to get rid of. I think she may have been a little too impatient to get rid of Max and alienate Shirin, because even if she doesn’t like them, those were votes she could have counted on for a while. It will be interesting to see if the other White Collars will turn out to be as gung ho about getting rid of Max as Carolyn was.

3. Hali

I realized I had forgotten to write anything about Hali until I thought I had finished the column. I don’t think that says a lot for her long-term game. I agree with her about Max’s gross Plantar’s wart though. "Hey, let's give the rest of my tribe a communicable disease!"

4. Will

Remember when the No Collars won the chickens, and they took the chicken that was going to become Will’s birthday meal and gave it a little stroking and attention? That is as strong a metaphor as Survivor can give – Will was the chicken being given a short good time, before being taken to the machete at Tribal Council.

So Will has a second life now – a spare vote that is useful to Jenn and Hali in maintaining control of the tribe and an opportunity to make new alliances with people he has more in common with, like Kelly and Carolyn.

5. Kelly

A challenge where blindfolded contestants have to drop a heavy wooden platform – - what could go wrong? After staying in the challenge while bleeding from the face, Probst should really be having one of his too-rare woman-crushes. Oh well, at least with the tribe switch Kelly doesn’t have to wear her blood-soaked buff any more.

Kelly’s interviews, where she relates her skills as an undercover cop to Survivor, are quickly becoming one of the highlights of the season. Thirty seasons into the show and I’m still learning new things about the game, like how joining a new tribe is like buying drugs from someone you don’t know.

Anyway, Kelly was brought in on the vote against Max at the last minute, and just went along because the others have the numbers. Not being part of the core group, she had better hope that the tribe follows the precedent of “vote out the most annoying.”

6. Shirin

I know we armchair-Survivors frequently admonish actual players of the game for not having trained in advance on how to start a fire, but Shirin has taken things to a new, uncomfortable level by researching on YouTube how to kill a chicken, and slaughtering a rabbit! Everyone is worried about alienating her, which is a pretty strong hint that they want to ditch her at the first opportunity. Also, she accused Probst of looking at her like she was delusional. That’s your first hint, Shirin.

There are the power rankings for the week. Tune in tonight to see if Joaquin and Rodney actually kiss, and then come back tomorrow for Jim’s graphic recap of the kiss, assuming there is one.

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