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Monet entered the room and she and Britney engaged in their usual Rachel beratements.

Monet: “My initial reaction was to punch her in the face but of course I couldn’t do that so I refrained.” And: “I can’t look at her. I just want to slap her in the face… She’s a stupid hooker.”

Later, Rachel and Britney had a heart to heart in the HoH room. Brendon was surprisingly absent. Alone together, Britney wept for her safety and explained that she didn’t understand why she and Monet were nominated.

Distraught, Rachel told Brendon that watching Britney cry was disheartening, and that she felt awful for nominating both her and Monet. Of course, Rachel has no idea Britney actually despises her.

Brendon talked her down from the ledge by giving her the classic “It’s just a game” speech. This sort of thing happens multiple times by multiple houseguests every season of Big Brother. By now, it has zero effect on houseguests and people watching from home.

Matt devised a lie to gather sympathy votes amongst his peers. Though the disease is real, Matt’s wife doesn’t actually have Melariatosis, a bone disease. Yep, I probably spelled that wrong.

Instead of saying that he tried out for Big Brother to pay for his wife’s cancer treatments or even a more basic surgery, Mattie launched into the specifics of a disease that less than one in a million have. Andrew, who’s secretly a doctor by day, said he’s never heard of Melariatosis and thinks Matt may have made the whole thing up. Yikes.

In the Power of Veto competition, six houseguests held briefcases while standing with their heads sticking through giant, American dollars. When they believed an hour had passed, they dropped the cases. Closest to an hour without going over won.

The interesting thing about the game – besides the mini bills that bitch slapped the contestants’ faces – were the different ways the contestants counted to an hour. Brendon counted in five-minute increments, Rachel counted off 3600 seconds (the correct number of seconds in an hour), Monet counted off 1200 seconds (the incorrect number of seconds in an hour) and Enzo thought of a specific drive he takes in Jersey with his wife that usually takes about an hour.

Though he went over the time limit, Enzo missed the mark by 14 seconds. Enzo: “That’s like one quickie with the wife, man.”

Britney won the PoV and later removed herself from the block. Her replacement would be Matt, who offered to be a pawn on the chopping block even after Brachel and the rest of the house had decided it would be Andrew. Matt thought he’d be a safer bet on getting Monet out of the house since the vote could go either way with Andrew.

On Thursday’s show, it was revealed that Hayden and Kristen had begun a “secret” showmance. Their way of keeping it secret was to talk dirty to each other and play tonsil hockey under the sheets while Andrew and Ragan were legit sleeping about five feet away in the same room.

In a talking head, Andrew said it was “like trying to fall asleep to a dirty movie.”

A scuffle ensued outside, and Rachel came out to mediate. She said there’s no reason for drama – Big Brother producers are probably like WTF?! – and reiterated why she wanted Monet gone.

Figuring it wasn't convincing enough, Rachel called a mandatory house meeting to let everyone know that Matt had approached her about being put up on the block as a pawn. Matt rebuked it, and said he was pressured into doing so. At the end of the day, everyone seemed to trust Matt just a little bit less.

At the live vote, Monet unfortunately became the second houseguest to be evicted from the Big Brother house. If only for her color commentary, here’s hoping Britney sticks around a bit longer than Monet did.

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