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“They don’t even understand their own language.” – Brent criticizing the Chinese language barrier. Ironically, the Chinese could justifiably make the same criticism of Brent.

With only two episodes left, last week’s non-elimination that spared Team Super Fuzz must have been the last one for the season. There will no longer be Phil’s voiceover of “the last team to check in MAY be eliminated.” Whoever hits the mat last tonight is outta here.

That reality is not particularly good news for Michael and Louie, who now have to perform a Speed Bump, which hasn’t been too daunting for the other teams this season, as they all have survived their leg with the extra task.

This penultimate episode begins with cowboys Jet and Cord leaving the mat in Shanghai at 8:02 a.m. and must find the “Garden Bridge” that the locals only know by its Chinese name, which I will not attempt to butcher here. After last week’s glimpse into the personal lives of the cowboys, more biographical info is spilled by Cord. Apparently, years ago, the hazard of being a cowboy caught up to Cord when he was trampled by a horse and hospitalized with a vague outlook for survival. Cord says that his brother was by his hospital bed the entire time. Surviving such a physical and emotional ordeal hints at why they work together so well. They are enjoying the Race but have a perspective on it and life that other teams have lacked.

Immediately, Jet and Cord find a local woman who points them to where she thinks they are supposed to go…but she’s wrong. Despite the clue consisting of only five simple words (“Go to the Garden Bridge”), the language gap is becoming a clear and possibly insurmountable obstacle.

Next off the mat 30 minutes later is Team Zoolander (or South Carolina if you aren’t feeling sarcastic) and Caite uses her interview time to continue lamenting the public’s reaction to get over her astonishingly horrid Miss Teen USA performance from three years ago. I wonder if she could help that cause by getting over it herself and not reminding us. Instead, the absence of her hatred for lesbians Brandy and Carol has been replaced by her commitment to prove all the naysayers wrong about her. I guess I fall into that category, so I am glad I could help motivate her.

While Brent and Caite get a solid assist from a lady who tells them where they should go and even writes it down to minimize a mess up with their pronunciation, the cowboys realize that they are in the wrong spot and have to find some correct guidance. Even with a taxi driver that has to call for directions, the boys seems to be soaking in this experience by joking and cutting up in the back of their cab.

In third place, brothers Dan and Jordan leave about 20 minutes after South Carolina and once again, Dan explains that he’s only there to give his brother his dream of finishing the Amazing Race and he can almost taste the million bucks.

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