| The Last Song | Clash of the Titans | Why Did I Get Married Too? | Winner
(1 point per category) |
Clearest Title | This movie could be about music. Or the apocalypse. | This movie could be about mythology. Or the sequel to Remember the Titans. | This movie could be about married couples with funny scenes and heartfelt moments. And that's all it could be about. | Not since Couples Retreat has a movie's plot been so easy to predict based on the title. Why Did I Get Married Too? gets the point. |
Best Genre &
Rating | Drama
Rated PG for thematic material, some violence, sensuality, and mild language.
| Action Adventure
Rated PG-13 for fantasy action violence, some frightening images, and brief sexuality.
| Dramedy
Rated PG-13 for thematic material including sexuality, language, drug references, and some domestic violence.
| This ain't no Valentine's Day weekend. Action Adventure is going to take this point by force. |
Cleverest Tagline
(out of 5 stars) | Do you ever really forget your first heartbreak?*
This may be the worst tagline of all time. Who would want to see a movie with this tagline?
0/5 stars
| Titans will clash.
This may actually be the worst tagline of all time. I mean, at least the previous movie's tagline wasn't "The Song will be Last."
0/5 stars
| Marriage is an institution they're committed too.
Not too bad. I had to think about it for a little bit, but then realized it was comparing marriage to a mental institution. ha.
2/5 stars
| Why Did I Get Married Too's tagline does not get LAST place, but CLASHes its opposition and gets the point for this round. |
Best Part of Trailer | Uhhh, teenagers should not fall in love, it's stupid, and they're too young. The father/daughter scenes were cute. | Despite watching hundreds of action trailers, this one was one of the better ones, impressive action shots mixed with good drum beats. | Definitely more on the drama side than the comedy side. Janet Jackson gets real intense. | The Titans Clash, crap, now the tagline is confusing me, Clash of the Titans wins the point for this round. |
Coolest Lead Actor | Miley Cyrus aka Hannah Montana (this may be the most accurate usage of "aka" in this column). | Sam Worthington aka Jake Sully from Avatar (One of the few that can claim to have had more viewers than Hannah Montana) | Tyler Perry aka an old woman named Madea (shoot, his "aka" is also really applicable to his name). | For all you Avatar haters out there, Sam Worthington is going to get this point (and yes, Avatar, the movie that revolutionized movie making, should have gotten the Best Picture Oscar). |
Best Cast Member | Greg Kinnear, from As Good as It Gets and Little Miss Sunshine. (I swear he was in The West Wing, but he really wasn't). | Liam Neeson from The Phantom Menace, Schindler's List, Taken, and the voice of Aslan in the Narnia Chronicles. | Janet Jackson from Why Did I Get Married?, Nutty Professor II, and ten episodes of Diff'rent Strokes. | I didn't even know that Why Did I Get Married Too was a sequel (Don't judge me). Ms. Jackson is for real, but Liam Neeson is going to win this point. |
Best Street Cred
for the Production | Director Julie Anne Robinson has also directed episodes of Grey's Anatomy. | Director Louis Leterrier has also directed The Incredible Hulk and Transporter 2. | Director, Writer, Producer Tyler Perry has also directed, written, and produced every other film he has made. | Tyler Perry literally creates his wildly successful films. Point for him. |