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In an early scene, the harpy girlfriend of Patrick Dempsey, as played by Idina Menzel (and, I gotta say, though I love Disney, them hiring such a talented actress-singer and having her not sing is pretty damn stupid), sees Giselle walking out of the shower and acting like a fairytale princess. What does she do? Complain about never getting to stay over at McDreamy's apartment. Because that's what you do when a fairytale princess waltzes out of your boyfriend's shower wearing a towel, and barely that. At no point in the film is the idea floated that, yeah, Giselle's just making all of this up, something that would seriously warp (potentially for the better) the movie's entire tone. It wouldn't work for Disney, but I'd love to see a serious look at someone with severe mental issues, as Giselle would have if she was in the real New York City.

Scott Calvin in The Santa Clause

Here's a perfect example of this phenomenon. Scott Calvin turns into Santa Claus, after inadvertently causing his death. That in itself is a bit dark, especially for a Disney movie. Sure, this was back when Tim Allen was starring on the sitcom Home Improvement, and was a welcome and calming presence for families. But, still: Santa dies in front of our eyes. Pretty traumatic. That aside, Scott Calvin is a lunatic. And, he's managed to make his own son insane, too. Sure, in the movie, Santa is real, but in real life, we have a guy running around and attempting to make himself look like a fabled character from children's stories. What's more, he's trying to rope his son in, to the point where he steals his own child from the kid's legally designated parental figures. He's insane, but he only winds up in a police station.

And, sure, he's broken out of that police station by his son and a group of fighting elves, but why isn't he put into a mental institution immediately? Would no one else think that this man is a danger to everyone? Yes, the idea that a man who claims that he's Santa Claus would be committed is heartbreaking to children of all ages, but it is what it is. Tim Allen, of course, manages to make Scott Calvin as sane as a man claiming to be Santa Claus could be. Unlike the other characters I've listed, he takes the entire situation with a big, heaping grain of salt, until he realizes that it's all really happening. I still think he's a nutjob, but at least he's a self-aware crazy person. That makes things a little more palatable.

Daniel Hilliard in Mrs. Doubtfire

Yes, I know. I could probably fill an entire list of characters played by Robin Williams who are absolutely crazy, and not in a good way. And, honestly, I kind of like Mrs. Doubtfire a lot. Williams' character, Daniel Hilliard, is, however, kind of insane. Granted, of the five movies on this list, this is the one that is grounded in real life. Yes, I realize that a guy dressing up as a fat Englishwoman to be closer to his children is insane, but we find out how Hilliard does what he does, and we know why he does what he does. You could say that his devotion to his children is admirable, and it is. But what Daniel Hilliard does is scary. He's told that he needs to get his life together, acquire an apartment, and pull down an honest job. He dresses up as Mrs. Doubtfire.

As a high-concept comedy, it's great. As real life, it's not. In real life, a guy like Daniel Hilliard, no matter how talented he may be at disguises, would be arrested and thrown in jail as soon as is humanly possible. A man who goes to such lengths as to break the law, even if by cross-dressing and stage makeup, is a man who should be nowhere near any children, especially his own. We admire the desperation in Williams' performance, because the desperation is heartfelt and appropriate. But, in a real man, that same desperation pushes him right to the precipice of being insane, not being a devoted and loving father. As I'm sure it would make some of you happy, I think that this Williams character should be committed, and right quick.

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