Survivor: Samoa

Damage Control

By Kim Hollis and David Mumpower

December 13, 2009

Ladies and gentlemen, two of the worst players in Survivor history!

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Previously on Survivor, Jim knocked us for being anti-Russell. He correctly pointed out that the man we had previously called Evil Loser Russell has somehow positioned himself to be a factor at the end of the game. The difference of opinion we have with Jim is whether he earned this spot or bungled into it due to the even worse gameplay of his competitors from Galu. Let's be honest here. If Erik hadn't been a dumbass to Jaison, Mick and Natalie, Foa Foa would have been swept out of this game. All Evil Russell's play to date has demonstrated is that he hates women, a point that cannot be denied, and that it's often better to be lucky than good on Suvivor. This season, we call it Shambo Law.

Speaking of the only person in the world who still sports Sylvester Stallone's 1980s hair (even Stallone thinks that's sad), Shambo's a bit confused about the previous vote. She had a dream that, although not quite Martin Luther King Jr.-esque, still spoke profoundly to her. This dream revealed that Dave would be the next one to go, and yet, there Dave sits at camp, after the vote! Shambo hates when her dreams lie to her.

And hey, would you look at that! Russell, who she had previously trusted completely, broke his word and arranged for rocket scientist John to be voted out. Only a fool would believe anything he said from now on!


Two minutes later, Evil Russell has convinced Shambo that he got rid of John to protect her.

Back from commercial break, Jaison happens upon Brett and Monica, who are discussing the fact that they are looking to be next on the chopping block. Jaison tells them that the game ain't over yet, and moves forward with a bit of strategy of his own as he tells them that Evil Russell is actually a millionaire in real life. This is actually an interesting tactical move. Since Jaison can deduce with a high likelihood and both Monica and Brett will be on the jury, letting them know that Evil Russell is wealthy can only help him if he's in a final vote with the man. We've seen it before. In a previous season, when retired NFL quarterback Gary Hogeboom was playing the game, people looked at him differently due to the fact that he already had a ready supply of cash. There's an expectation that if you're playing this game to win a million bucks, it's because you *need* a million bucks.

There's only one problem with Jaison's decision here. If it does get back to Evil Russell that he spilled the beans on this topic to some Galu tribe members, that likely will put Jaison in Russell's crosshairs. We know that Evil Russell will target people out of vengeance, whether it's to his own benefit or detriment. If he thinks Jaison has betrayed him, he might see him as a potential target. (As we've seen, this doesn't guarantee the rest of the votes go Evil Russell's way, but we're getting to the point where it's very risky to put yourself out there in any way.)

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