Take Five

By George Rose

November 18, 2009

You said you wouldn't order blood tonight. That poor waitress is still crying in terror.

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But with all these movies coming out and the little free time we have, who's staying in the house to watch movies? Oh wait, we're in a recession. Not everyone can afford to see tons of movies. Heck, even I can't afford to see all the movies I want to see. Normally, I'd see a movie like New two to four times in theaters (I'm a super fan like that), but because of this annoying recession I will only see it once. That, in turn, frees up some of my time for an enjoyable at-home movie-watching experience. I'm sure I'm not the only one, so if you need a few suggestions you should check these five films out.

Little Giants (1994)

In honor of the end of the baseball season and attention being diverted to football, I figured I'd recommend one of the few football movies I can tolerate. I have so much fun ragging on sports and sports movies, but I'd be lying if I said I NEVER enjoy them. Honestly, I'd rather have my wisdom teeth taken out again then watch months and months of the same nonsense, but that doesn't mean I don't enjoy the World Series or the Super Bowl. That also doesn't mean I don't like the occasional feel-good sport movie. You know the kind, where the absolute worst team possible with the worst odds imaginable somehow wins the big title. Is it predictable? Yes. Is it cheesy? Yes. Does it still make the fat boy in me who got picked last every time in gym class cry like a little baby? You bet.


It pains me a little to pick this movie, because now that I've grown up I've come to realize how annoying New York sports team fans are. I'm not just saying that because the Yankees won the series. I could care less who wins, but Yankee fans sure take all the fun out of sports. The same can be said of Giants fans. Maybe it's because New York is the biggest city in the country and, therefore, has the most amount of fans, and the most funding for buying team players and affording an evil marketing empire. While New York sports teams and their fans suck donkey balls, Little Giants is one of those children-led sports movies I loved growing up.

The movie's biggest name is Rick Moranis, who is no amateur to the family film genre. Here he stars as Danny O'Shea, the un-athletic, unsuccessful brother of the town legend Kevin O'Shea, played by Ed O'Neill (whose new ABC comedy Modern Family is AMAZING). After making a bet over whose pee-wee football team will win the little league title, it's up to Danny to form an all-star roster of loveable losers. There's the hypoallergenic nerd with oversized glasses, the fat kid, the token minority, a girl (the coach's daughter), and the pretty boy (the girl's love interest). There is no reason they should win, but the fat kid in me doesn't love the movie because they didn't. Everyone wins watching Little Giants, even Eagles fans.

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