Take Five

By George Rose

November 10, 2009

Jeff Goldblum is a poor substitute for DJ Jazzy Jeff.

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McConaughey stars as a man-child who, at the age of 35, has still not moved out of his parent's house. Because nobody wants a middle aged sexual deviant living in their house, his parents decide to hire Parker to convince him to move out. How does she do this? She pretends to date him, following a set of steps that's been proven to help men mature and become independent enough to feel ready for life on their own, or with a partner. Still, the mission is to get these men that have "failed to launch" out of the house. Naturally, Parker falls in love with McConaughey along the way, but the comic geniuses known as Deschanel and Bartha provide the laughs needed to sustain the adventure. What made me consider this movie extra special was how much my Yankee loving friend hated it; since he is one of those alpha men who thinks they are impervious to the ways of women, he was mortified to hear the reasoning behind Parker's plan to land the man. To him, men usually con women into affection, so I was all the more delighted when his jaw dropped upon hearing Parker say, "Today I let him help me through a crisis. That brought us much closer together. Things are going well, actually. Tomorrow I might let him teach me something." Sorry to say it to all my brothers out there, but guys aren't the only ones running good game. In the words of the New York loving Jay-Z, "Ladies is pimps, too, go and brush your shoulders off." The Yankees may have won the series, but they weren't the only winners in my book last week. That is, until New Moon comes out in less than two weeks and makes women look like helpless, overly-emo drama queens that can only be happy when in love with mythical creatures. Once that comes out, I'm sure my buddy will lose respect for women again. Let's just hope Parker's holiday release Did You Hear About the Morgans? brings back some of that girl power.


TV's South Park, season 13 (2009)

Those of you who have been following Take Five know that I occasionally recommend a season of television as a substitute to one movie. Usually this honor is reserved for only the most epic seasons of television. Since I just joined the Lost party a few months ago, I've been catching up on all the seasons I never saw and have been recommending them as I complete each one. The show is THAT good. Because the most recent episode of South Park has touched my heart in a very personal way, I decided to repay it and share my affection for the show with the world, in hopes that those of you who aren't watching it will start soon. Let's be honest, if you're watching Family Guy or American Dad, you really need to re-evaluate yourself. You simply can't beat the quality of a cartoon comedy when it comes to South Park (unless you're The Simpsons, but right now its South Park's shining moment).

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