TiVoPlex

By John Seal

October 26, 2009

After you overeat in the buffet, please join me in the casino

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11:00 PM Turner Classic Movies
Zaat (1975 USA): Also known as Attack of the Swamp Creatures and Blood Waters of Dr. Z, Zaat is one of the least likeliest movies ever to air on TCM. Currently ranked seventh worst film of all time by IMDb users (sitting four spots behind Superbabies: Baby Geniuses 2), the film tells the sordid tale of scientist Kurt Leopold (Marshall Grauer, in his only film to date) who turns himself into a killer catfish (Wade Popwell, in HIS only film to date). This shot in Florida travesty IS terrible, but it's also terribly entertaining, and is essential viewing for fans of all things psychotronic. It's followed at 12:45 AM by a rare widescreen airing of Swamp Thing (1982), an amusing Wes Craven joint starring Adrienne Barbeau's cleavage.

Saturday 10/31/09

2:15 AM HDNet Movies
Black Christmas (1974 CAN): Bob Clark's proto-slasher classic returns to television this morning in full HD glory. Set during the most wonderful time of the year, the film relates the dreadful fate of a group of sorority sisters being harassed — and then killed — by a mysterious attic dweller. Remade to dreadful effect in 2006, the original Black Christmas is a satisfying and very creepy thriller with a great cast, including Keir Dullea, Olivia Hussey, Margot Kidder, John Saxon, Andrea Martin, and Art Hindle.

7:00 PM Turner Classic Movies
Murders in the Zoo (1933 USA): What would you do if you found out your wife had been cheating on you? If you're anything like Eric Gorman (Lionel Atwill), you'd kill the cuckolders — and anyone else who annoys you — with the wild animals you've just imported from the Far East. This outrageous Paramount thriller features what must have been much needed comic relief for 1933 audiences from Charles Ruggles, love interest from Gail Patrick and Randolph Scott, and a heaping helping of zoological mayhem.




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Sunday 11/01/09

7:00 PM MGM HD
The Video Dead (1987 USA): Somewhere around the old homestead I still have a VHS copy of this film, taped — I think — from USA's Up All Night, or perhaps Commander USA's Groovy Movies. Whichever it was, that tape is going to be rendered obsolete thanks to this inaugural HD broadcast of this home video anti-classic. The bare bones story involves a television set that serves as a portal for the undead, who transit from the ether to the physical world whenever someone starts to nod off during commercials. There are elements here of Poltergeist, Nightmare on Elm Street, and every zombie film made prior to The Video Dead, but this was also an influential film in its own right — assuming that Hideo Nakata rented it one night shortly before beginning production of 1998's The Ring.

Monday 11/02/09

9:30 AM Fox Movie Channel
Vicki (1953 USA): This remake of 1941's I Wake Up Screaming probably seemed surplus to requirements at the time, but in retrospect it doesn't look too bad. Told via flashbacks, the film examines the life and violent death of Vicki Lynn (Jean Peters), a "super-model" whose murder is being investigated by police detective Ed Cornell (Richard Boone). Ed learns that Vicki started out waiting tables, but achieved fame thanks to canny publicity man Steve Christopher (Mercury Theatre vet Elliott Reid) — and begins to suspect that Christopher may be implicated in her demise. If you've recently screened I Wake Up Screaming (or recently read Steve Fisher's excellent hardboiled source novel), you can probably give Vicki a miss — but if not, or if you're a Richard Boone fan, check it out.

6:00 PM Sundance
The Youngest Candidate (2008 USA): Never trust a political candidate under 20! Heck, don't trust any OVER 20 either, for that matter — but trust me about this engaging documentary about youngsters running for public office before they can legally drink. No congressional candidates here, of course — these kids are running for seats on the local school board or city council — but one can easily imagine them using these races as springboards for national political careers. Even if you think that voting only encourages them, you'll probably get some sick kicks from scoping out this salute to our future ruling class. Don't blame me, I voted for Kodos!


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