Mama Said There'd Be Days Like This
By Kim Hollis and David Mumpower
February 27, 2009
The next segment reinforces everything we decided about Coach on first impression. First, he offers a disingenuous speech to his teammates about not blaming any single person for their failures in the competition. Immediately afterward, he confers with Tyson about which members of the challenge performed the worst. Sierra takes the brunt of his criticism, but a couple of the other women get dinged as well. We don't want to psychoanalyze it too much, but we're guessing Coach's relationship with his mother has been strained at times.
Humorously, this scene is interspliced with Tyson offering comments where he eviscerates Coach for every single one of his crippling personality flaws. It's nice to see that he doesn't like the guy any more than we do.
While several minutes are dedicated to Coach's ranting about the fact that winning is better than losing (he's not much of a motivational speaker), the real discussions are taking place on Exile Island. Brendan and Taj are given another clue about the location of the immunity idol hidden at each of their camps. The two of them embark upon a long-term strategy for a super-secret four-player alliance combining players from both tribes. Taj states an intent to bring Stephen into the fold, while Brendan plans to cut a deal with Sierra. This sounds nice in theory, but we find it hard to believe that Stephen will make any kind of deal that doesn't involve JT. The other problem with this strategy is that it's still at least four people to the merge, so there's no guaranteeing that any of these people will make it that far. Sierra in particular seems like a longshot.
The next day sees the Jalapao enjoy what Doctor Zoidberg would describe as some "just friends cuddling". The group is relishing in the fact that their new shelter provides them with the sort of comfort that Timbira can only dream about. It's the depressing downside in not retrieving water and corn quickly when you're blindfolded. Of course, the folks at Timbira probably feel better about their fate while watching this episode. Now they know that the other tribe may have had better shelter, but they also had Sandy discussing what a sex kitten she is. I'll sleep out on the dirt in the rain, thanks.
Sensing a need to change the subject from Sandy getting the horn, the producers quickly cut to the immunity challenge. The task today is to take gigantic letter blocks and shove them back to their base. Then, they are to decipher the message by aligning various symbols. This would be the perfect assignment for either Baby Goliath or Shaquille O'Neal. For Timbira, it's another example that they're collapsing as a group. Jerry almost collapses from exhaustion at one point, then announces after his team has lost, "I'm through. I'm finished."
Meanwhile, Coach looks on in frustration as Team Sandy the Sex Kitten celebrates yet another victory. If nothing else, this is a satisfying result for the way that it devours his soul. After offering a primal scream following the reward challenge lost, he finishes the immunity challenge by giving the stink eye to everyone else on the island including Probst. Our host drives the nail in deeper by pointing out that this is their third consecutive loss. At this point, Coach looks like he's ready for a murderous rampage, but the tribe would have to earn a machete at a reward challenge first for that to happen.