TiVoPlex

By John Seal

January 10, 2005

But how do you thank someone who has taken you from crayons to perfume?

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From the obscure to the obscurest to the merely overlooked or underappreciated; they all have a home in the TiVoPlex! All times Pacific.

Tuesday 01/11/05

3:30am The Movie Channel
To Sir With Love (1967 GB): One of my favorite guilty pleasures gets a wide-screen airing this morning thanks to TMC. It's the familiar tale of one man (in this case Sidney Poitier, playing an unemployed engineer temporarily employed in a grotty east London school) trying to make a difference in the lives of his unruly pupils. Amongst the student body are cheeky lass Lulu, who sings the film's mawkish title song, love-struck Judy Geeson, and a very young Michael Des Barres, a few years prior to hooking up with rock groupie Pamela Miller. It's amusing to see what was considered rough-and-tumble behavior circa 1967, as the youngsters smoke cigarettes, slam doors, and talk back to their elders, but the film's message of the power of progressive education shines through and will leave a warm fuzzy glow within all but the stoniest of troglodyte's hearts. Add in some great songs by the Mindbenders sans Wayne Fontana and some suitably fab teenage gear, and the end result is an extremely enjoyable 1960s time capsule. Also airs at 6:30am, 3:05pm, and 6:05pm, and throughout the month on Black Starz! for those who prefer a full frame presentation.

8:50am Showtime Extreme
The Legend II (1993 HK): Once again starring Jet Li as the worst enemy of the wicked Manchu Dynasty, this sequel to 1993's martial arts spectacular The Legend of Fong Sai Yuk is actually the better of the two films. This time Fong (Li) has two demanding and jealous wives (Michele Reis and Amy Kwok) to contend with in between battles with the Manchus, who are still intent on wiping out Fong's troublesome and rebellious Red Flower Society. The film co-stars genre veteran Josephine Siao in a scene-stealing turn as Fong's mother and features some truly spectacular action sequences, including a balancing act finale that can't adequately be described in words. Released in the United States by Dimension - who managed to provide the film with a passable English dubbing track - The Legend II is, bizarrely, rated R. While the film IS filled with wall-to-wall comic action, it includes very little bloodshed, and is suitable for little boys over the age of ten and anyone else who likes to see people engaging in swordplay whilst blindfolded. Showtime is airing a letterboxed print, which shows Pin Bing Lee's beautiful cinematography to full advantage. Also airs at 7pm and 1/16 at 1:20pm.

Wednesday 01/12/05

2:15pm Encore Love Stories
Once Upon a Time in the Midlands (2002 GB): Shane Meadow's mordant comedy drama teeters into overly-cute territory from time to time, but ultimately it's one of the best British films of recent vintage, accurately capturing the atmosphere of suburban working-class life without straying too far into Mike Leigh or Ken Loach territory. In other words, Meadows is very much his own filmmaker, with a distinctly different (and less political) take on modern British life than the aforementioned auteurs. Starring Trainspotting's Robert Carlyle as bad lad Jimmy, a Nottingham exile returning to his home town to win back the heart of lady love Shirley Henderson, the film also features Notting Hill gurner Rhys Ifans in a rare straight role as Henderson's new paramour. The film's title and setting offer tribute to the spaghetti-western genre (in recent years, Nottingham has been the scene of a long simmering gang war), but Once Upon a Time in the Midlands is at heart a typically low-key British film, its well-crafted story blessed by solid performances from all concerned, including Ifans, helium-voiced Henderson, and the always fine Kathy Burke, here cast as Henderson's best friend and confidante. Look for director Meadows and co-writer Paul Frasor in a bingo-hall scene. Also airs 1/16 at 12:40pm.

Thursday 01/13/05

11:30am Flix
The Madness of King George (1995 GB): One of my favorite movie biz stories involves this film. When Samuel Goldwyn picked it up for Stateside distribution, they changed the original British title, The Madness of George III, because they were concerned American audiences might think this was a sequel. Really! I'm not making this up! King George III was, of course, the British monarch indirectly responsible for losing the American colonies in 1776, and like most sequels, he couldn't hold a candle to either George I, who ascended to the throne because he was a Protestant (thus spurring the Jacobite Rebellion); or George II, who finally put down the Jacobites at the Battle of Culloden. George III ascended to the throne in 1760, but didn't lose his marbles until 1810, perhaps due to the hereditary condition known as porphyria. He held down the throne until 1820, setting, upon his demise, a still unsurpassed record for longest reign by a British king. Nigel Hawthorne brilliantly recreates the final decade of George's life in this film and received a well-deserved Academy Award nomination for his performance, but on balance the film is an average frock flick about palace intrigue and the line of succession. It's worth watching for Hawthorne, and at least gets the letterboxed treatment this morning. Also airs 1/14 at 1am and 1/16 at 5pm.

7:45pm Starz!
The Barbarian Invasions(2003 CAN-FRA): I missed the theatrical run of this French language film from north of the border, and frankly I'm not sure I'm all that upset about it. Lauded by many critics - including Roger Ebert, who gave it four stars - the film also drew contentious commentary from some quarters. To quote one of my favorite film critics, The Guardian's Peter Bradshaw: "This grotesquely overpraised movie�is shot through with middlebrow sophistication, boorish cynicism, unfunny satire, a dash of fatuous anti-Americanism and unthinkingly reactionary sexual politics." Which put me right off my dinner, or at least discouraged me from plopping down a tenner at the local arthouse. However, the film did go on to win the Academy Award for Best Foreign Language Film last year. The Barbarian Invasions makes its American television debut this evening, and for once, I'm asking my readers to let me know if it's worth a look. Feedback please! Also airs at 10:45pm.

Friday 01/14/05

Noon Showtime
Little Cigars (1973 USA): Is there anything funnier than a group of circus midgets? How about a group of circus midgets who rob banks with the help of a sexy waitress (Angel Tompkins)? That's the premise of this incredibly insensitive and blindingly un-PC comedy from our old friends at American International Pictures. Amongst the cast of tiny miscreants are former Munchkins Jerry Maren and Billy Curtis; Cousin Itt himself, Felix Silla; and Freaks star Angelo Rossitto; all of whom were probably grateful to get a paycheck. If you enjoy similarly absurd 1970s crime capers like Bunny O'Hare (1971) and The Doberman Gang (1972), you'll enjoy Little Cigars. It hasn't been seen on home video or television for many moons, so be sure you don't miss it. Or trip over it. Also airs at 3pm.

11pm Turner Classic Movies
Quai des Brumes (1938 FRA): Last month TCM aired Le Jour Se Leve, director Marcel Carne and screenwriter Jacques Prevert's 1939 collaboration. This month we're blessed with the presence of Quai des Brumes, a film they produced together a year earlier. As in Le Jour Se Leve, the star is Jean Gabin, this time portraying an army deserter on the run. He's heading for the port of Le Havre, where he hopes to hop aboard a merchant ship and sail for points unknown. Alas, love intervenes, in the person of beautiful Michele Morgan, who's also being wooed by local gangster Pierre Brasseur. Whilst the story set up bears similarities to that of Le Jour Se Leve, this film moves in different directions and features a less downbeat ending. One of the classics of the short-lived "poetic realism" movement that set the stage for the films noir of the 1940s, Les Quai des Brumes oozes atmosphere, thanks to Eugen Schufftan's fogbound cinematography.

Saturday 01/15/05

1:40am Sundance
Paradox Lake (2002 USA): This unusual and occasionally disturbing look at the treatment of autistic children and teenagers will raise far more questions than it answers for most viewers. The film, whilst wholly fictional, stars a cast of autistic children and real-life counselors and is set at a summer camp where simple day-to-day tasks assume an almost overpowering level of complexity. Polish director Przemyslaw Reut coaxed good performances from his "star", Matt Wolf, a USC film grad, but the heavy lifting is done by the autistic children, especially Jessica Fuchs as the young woman who develops a mysterious relationship with Wolf via her collection of toy animals. The film, regardless of its very low budget, is quite ambitious, and ends on an ambiguous, though hopeful, note.

7pm Flix
Master of the Flying Guillotine (1975 HK): After a lengthy pan-and-scan sojourn spent on Showtime, this outrageous martial arts classic returns to the small screen in its much-preferred wide-screen format. Director Jimmy Wang Yu stars as a one-armed boxer engaged in a battle to the death against a blind man with a grudge. If you enjoy watching disabled people fight each other, decapitation by flying guillotine (a weapon that looks a little like a red velvet lampshade lined with blades), or Indian mystics who can lengthen their arms at will � la Stretch Armstrong, this is your movie.

Sunday 01/16/05

9pm Turner Classic Movies
Garden of Eden (1928 USA): This technically superb silent feature makes its television premiere this evening. Directed by Lewis Milestone, whose exemplary comedy Two Arabian Knights appeared for the first time in public (also on TCM) in over 70 years last December, Garden of Eden is a lush romance about a poor little rich girl (Corinne Griffith) whose rustic past spent kneading dough in a pretzel factory threatens to derail her relationship with a hoity-toity Parisian bachelor (poverty-stricken former film producer Charles Ray). Providing a soup�on of Lubitsch-style sophisticated comedy - perhaps due to the presence of screenwriter and frequent Lubitsch collaborator Hans Kraly - Garden of Eden also features Louise Dresser as Griffith's mentor and features brilliant production design by William Cameron Menzies.

Monday 01/17/05

11am HBO Family
Living Dolls: The Making of a Child Beauty Queen (2001 USA): Some people are disturbed by film violence. Others are deeply disgusted by big-screen sex. Few films, however, have made me squirm in my seat as much as this HBO original documentary about the deeply-twisted world of child beauty pageants. Following the fortunes of Swan, an aptly-named five-year-old with an unfeasibly large bouffant, and her ex-Marine Corps stage mom Robyn, Living Dolls offers unspoken commentary on the state of the family and on gender roles in American society. For those adults who live vicariously through the successes (or, more to the point, the failures) of their offspring, this film may serve as a wakeup call. But probably not. Also airs at 2pm.


     


 
 

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