The Amazing Race Season 31

You're the Apple in My Eye

By Kim Hollis & David Mumpower

June 12, 2019

Blech.

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Previously on The Amazing Race, the incompetent sisters from Big Brother once again did just enough to avoid elimination. So did everyone else, but it’s become a trend for the Reillys.

Really, all we care about is that our favorites, Tyler & Korey have won two consecutive legs. They join Christie & Colin as the class of the season. Yes, we just called Colin “the class.”

We start the episode with reminders of teams talking about how much they hate the Reilly sisters. This is probably important because tonight introduces the first ever U-Turn vote. This preview includes Nicole’s meltdown in the previous leg, though it was at least somewhat provoked by Rachel & Elissa.

Tyler & Korey are the first to leave Meiringen, Switzerland at 4:56 a.m. They will drive to the village of Ballenberg, where they’ll find their first clue. Since they’re driving, we have a chance of no bunching this leg! First place to fourth place is just 13 minutes, and the teams after Tyler & Korey are Christie & Colin, the Afghanimals, and Team Fun.

Fifth place Rachel & Elissa are not quite an hour behind Tyler & Korey, with Chris & Bret leaving just moments after them. Nicole & Victor are leaving at 6:05 a.m., so they are 16 minutes behind the sisters.

Rachel notes that she now holds the record for most legs run in The Amazing Race – 32. Ugh. She feels like today is going to be her day, but she and Elissa seem to get lost quickly. They get the “You messed up” music.

Once Tyler & Korey arrive at Ballenberg, they realize that they can’t start their first task until 7 a.m. There is a cat on the scene, and it LOOOOOOVES Tyler & Korey. Leo is excited to see it, too.

Rachel & Elissa take the Afghanimals aside to try to beg their forgiveness for being utter jerkfaces in the previous leg. Survivor Chris notes that the sisters have once again excluded him and Bret from the conversation. The women always ignore them.

“Bret and I don’t have enough Instagram followers,” he whispers. Savage burn.

Away from the sisters, Leo & Jamal note that they really haven’t let bygones be bygones. If there’s a U-Turn, they’re choosing Rachel & Elissa.

“Also, there’s a cat here,” Leo tells the Reillys.

Chris & Bret have been lurking nearby, listening. “It’s good to be Switzerland… It’s good to be Switzerland in Switzerland.”

The Ballenberg gate opens and we definitely have bunching. Phil is actually waiting for them to arrive at the Community Hall. “Switzerland is a country that believes it has the oldest democracy in the world.” He announces the U-Turn vote, and yes, they will do it publicly rather than in a secret vote. So, if you wanted to go after a huge threat, right now might not be the best time.

There is in fact a catch, though. Two teams will have to complete the U-Turn, not just one. Also, and this is a HUGE deal, there are no more elimination legs remaining in the Race. You can’t see it, but we just fist bumped.

“Not since 2016 has there been such a big vote,” says Korey. Here’s hoping people show more common sense this time.

The voting order was determined randomly, and first up are Rachel & Elissa.

“This is 1000 percent game related,” says Rachel, as she calls out Colin & Christie’s names. Ooooookay. You can see Elissa cringe at the decision.

Nicole & Victor also claim to be voting strategically, and Victor chooses the Afghanimals. Nicole is furious about this, but Victor realizes they will have to vote for two teams. Rachel & Elissa say, “Thank you,” but it’s not about being nice in this circumstance.

Next up, Colin & Christie choose Rachel & Elissa, while the Afghanimals pick Colin & Christie (as they say, “Thank you!” to Rachel & Elissa’s dumb gameplay in their head). The Survivor guys have to be thinking these people are idiots.

It’s another vote for Colin & Christie when Team Fun throws them a vote. Tyler & Korey burn their vote by going with Nicole & Victor. It’s basically up to Chris & Bret, who pick the Reillys. There will not be two votes, but instead the first and second place vote-getters will do the U-Turn.

“I couldn’t tell you anything about the O’Reillys, except that they have long eyelashes and like to fix them every five minutes,” says Bret. They also don’t know that their last name is actually Reilly. And in fact, Elissa’s is Slater. But honestly, it proves the point.

Rachel berates the guys over this decision, telling them they’ve just lost a million dollars, mainly because the sisters theorize that the Survivor bros need to keep someone weak in the race so that they can all fight it out for the bottom spot over the next few legs. The sisters seem to forget that the other teams might also want some people they can work with or enjoy having around.

The Detour requires the teams to either “Make Hay” or “Cow Festival.” And Colin & Christie and Rachel & Elissa have to do both. For “Make Hay,” one team member must use a scythe to cut some hay, while the other team member will gather it. Once they have the right amount, they can move on. For “Cow Festival,” they have to dress up a cow to be judged for a festival. It’s as ridiculous as it sounds. Also, wasn’t this a plot line in Jeff Smith’s Bone stories?




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Meanwhile, Nicole & Victor have to complete their Speed Bump, which involves them taking down and folding 26 flags representing the different Swiss states. Nicole is still bitching at him over making a bad move choosing the Afghanimals, but her preferred team (Rachel & Elissa) is still doing the U-Turn. Hopefully she’ll settle down, because it was this kind of behavior that set them back on the last lg.

The cow contest requires a lot of attention to detail, which has not traditionally been Rachel & Elissa’s strong suit. Over at haymaking, Becca is a savant with the scythe.

Maybe I mentioned Rachel & Elissa’s faults with detail too soon, because it’s Colin & Chriistie who are losing headdress pieces and getting frustrated. Nicole & Victor finish the Speed Bump and head to the cow task.

Rachel & Elissa’s cow is stubborn and refusing to move. Colin reminds us he once threw a fit over an ox. He allows Christie to choose the cow with the best vibe.

Farmer Becca finishes the task first, so she and Floyd are now directed to proceed to Oberschwanden. They agree to work with Tyler & Korey to get to the next location, and Chris & Bret are done as well.

Rachel figures out that the cow will move if you grab its tail and pat its booty. Meanwhile, Colin & Christie’s cow is super stubborn and it might be time for Colin to Hulk out.

Although Rachel & Elissa’s cow decoration is good, they forgot their clue back at the decoration table. They ask Colin & Christie if they can look at their clue, and obviously the veteran Amazing Race players say, “Absolutely not.” Also, there’s usually a penalty if you leave a clue behind, so we wonder if that will also come into play.

At the Roadblock, Tyler & Korey are in first place. It involves a William Tell-themed task. One team member has to shoot a crossbow arrow at an apple on a dummy’s head.

On their first shots, Tyler, Becca, and Bret all shoot the dummy’s head off. It’s kind of hilarious.

Colin & Christie blow through the hay challenge, while the Afghanimals drive around lost. Although Tyler & Becca both shoot their dummies in the head again, Bret hits the apple, which means that he and Chris will now take a small motorboat to the Pitstop at the Grand Hotel Giessbach.

Remember: the last team to arrive WILL be eliminated.

After hitting her dummy in the head again, Becca says, “Monkey pooper.” Our beloved Tyler hits his, though. He tells Becca that she should look above her viewfinder rather than in it.

Leo & Jamal are still lost, and Jamal is fury incarnate. Jamal estimates that they’ve lost 40 minutes to the error so far. Rachel & Elissa finish mowing the hay, and might manage to beat the Afghanimals to the task if they’re smart enough to use a map.

Nicole & Victor are fourth to arrive at the William Tell challenge, followed by Christie & Colin. Colin & Victor are shooting for their teams. As speculated, Rachel & Elissa have beaten the Afghanimals to the Roadblock – by a few moments.

It really is a race to the bottom. Rachel & Jamal take the task for their team.

Becca finally hits the apple, followed by Colin. The Survivor guys and Tyler & Korey are racing for the mat, and since Bret really can’t run, it’s probably going to be Tyler & Korey. They can choose between taking a Funicular or running on foot. Since Bret struggles with running, they try the funicular, but it isn’t leaving for an hour. Thus, Tyler and Korey win a third consecutive leg.

Victor hits the apple. It’s between Jamal and Rachel. And… Jamal hits the apple. Hopefully, they can actually find their way to the Pitstop. They’d better not get lost, because Rachel hits it as the brothers leave.

In an impressive turnaround, Christie & Colin finish third, followed by Becca & Floyd. They hug, and Team Fun apologizes for voting for Christie & Colin. “That was your one bygone,” says Colin.

Thankfully, Nicole & Victor and Leo & Jamal all arrive at the same time. Leo & Jamal have no hard feelings. Well, Leo doesn’t anyway. Jamal is still on tilt.

Cue the sad music. Well, The Amazing Race plays the sad music. We have Kool & the Gang’s “Celebrate” on at max volume. Rachel & Elissa are eliminated. Rachel cries, and hopefully we never have to hear that sound again.


     


 
 

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