Viking Night: Omega Man

By Bruce Hall

March 29, 2016

Being the last man on Earth is fun!

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It should be gripping. But despite efforts to make Los Angeles appear deserted (Film on a Sunday! Use grainy still photos!) you still catch an occasional pedestrian or car in the distance. That's not a huge deal but between that, Heston's trademark mugging and the suspiciously frugal production values, it's hard to take the story as seriously as it probably wants to be. Plus, if you're the kind of guy who likes high concept science fiction, you may find yourself wondering how, after two years, the power grid is still on. The gasoline in all the cars he steals is still good. The batteries are still charged. Aside from the conspicuous lack of people, there's really nothing happening here to convincingly indicate that civilization has been in ruin for 24 months. These are little things, and I know what you're thinking - I should be able to suspend my disbelief. But that only works when the gaps in logic allow you to tell a better story.

Not so much here.

The biggest issue is that if you haven't guessed by now (or if you've seen the movie posters), the last man on earth is not alone. Neville escaped the plague because he happened to be the guy working on a cure. Everyone else either died or was turned into something called a “nocturnal albino.” This is because the screenwriter found this more believable than “vampires.” I'm all for telling grounded stories, but when we first meet The Family (named after that one Fallout 3 mission, no doubt), they're led by a former television host named Matthias (Anthony Zerbe), who has them all dressed in matching futuristic black robes and aviator sunglasses.

I find this amazing. I can't get three people to dress alike on Halloween, with three months of advance notice. I'm not sure why, but I had a hard time getting my head around where a bunch of starving, diseased mutants got their hands on 1,500 pairs of matching Ray Bans, not to mention 700 bolts of that shiny looking fabric.

But that's not the worst thing in the world, either. The worst thing in the world is how The Family spend their evenings hanging around outside Neville's apartment, plotting how to destroy him. They blame him for the plague, even though it's common knowledge that the communists did it. Neville spends his time collecting art, drinking wine, and playing chess with a bust of Julius Caesar. His apartment is fortified with razor wire, sandbags and floodlights, and he keeps a high-powered rifle fitted with night vision at the ready. He's so confident in his security arrangements that he rarely even closes the patio door. Between you and me, it looks like an 11-foot ladder is all you'd need to take the place. Seriously, a couple of guys on pogo sticks with work gloves could probably at least get their hands on the balcony.

But The Family can't seem to crack ladder technology, so they build a freaking trebuchet instead.

You heard me. Breaking into Ace Hardware for a ladder was too much of a stretch, so someone went down to the library, checked out a book on 12th century battlefield tech, set up a drafting board, spent weeks planning the construction, collecting the materials, and deploying the weapon - only to fail as badly as if they'd attacked with water balloons. What was even the point?


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