This Month, Watch This

A comparison for the new releases for October 2015

By Curt David

October 8, 2015

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New movies are released into theaters every weekend. How do you decide which movie to watch? I’ll save you the hassle of researching every movie, by comparing the new releases for each weekend in this column. Then I’ll tell you which movie you should watch in the theaters.

For the past six years, I have compared the new releases for each weekend and told you which movie was the best bet to watch. This is the third month where I am going to attempt to compare the new releases for the entire month and rank them in the order you should watch them. What could go wrong? (well, a movie could change its release date after this column was written, a BOP reader could go through withdrawal by only getting one column from me this month, etc.)

For the month of October 2015, the new movies in wide release are as follows:
October 2:
The Martian
October 9:
Pan
The Walk
October 16:
Bridge of Spies
Crimson Peak
Goosebumps
October 23:
Burnt
Jem and the Holograms
The Last Witch Hunter
Paranormal Activity: The Ghost Dimension
Rock the Kasbah
Steve Jobs
October 30
Our Brand Is Crisis
Scouts Guide to the Zombie Apocalypse

I predict a movie’s watchability by seven criteria. For each criterion, I am going to rank these movies from the best to the worst. If a movie get first place in a category, it will get one point. Last place, it will get 14 points. Then. I’ll calculate the best movies to watch this month at the end of the column (the fewer points the better).

CLEAREST TITLE (Is the title recognizable or unique enough to make me watch the movie. The titles were so good this month, I made this category out of 7 points instead of 14 points!)
1- Goosebumps - I read those books when I was a kid!
1- Paranormal Activity: The Ghost Dimension - This is another Paranormal sequel.
2- Steve Jobs - I know that guy.
2- Pan - As in Peter?
3- Jem and the Holograms - The 80s cartoon?
3- The Martian - This will probably be about Mars.
4- Bridge of Spies - This about spies.
4- Scouts Guide to the Zombie Apocalypse - This about Zombies!
5- The Last Witch Hunter - Witches.
5- Rock the Kasbah - Not sure, but sounds good.
6- Crimson Peak - Not sure, but sounds decent.
6- Our Brand is Crisis - Not sure, but sounds fine.
7- Burnt - Not sure, but sounds.
7- The Walk - A walk? Really?


BEST GENRE & RATING (elevated status if you are the only genre or rating for the entire month)
1- Scouts Guide to the Zombie Apocalypse - (Comedy Horror, R)
1- The Walk - (Adventure Biography, PG)
2- Goosebumps - (Adventure Fantasy, PG)
2- The Martian - (Drama Sci-fi, PG-13)
2- The Last Witch Hunter - (Action Fantasy, PG-13)
2- Rock the Kasbah - (Comedy Music, R)
2- Our Brand is Crisis - (Comedy Drama, R)
3- Crimson Peak - (Drama Horror, R)
3- Jem and the Holograms - (Drama Music, PG)
3- Steve Jobs - (Biography, R)
3- Pan - (Adventure Family, PG)
3- Bridge of Spies - (Drama Thriller, PG-13)
3- Burnt - (Comedy Drama, Not Yet Rated)
3- Paranormal Activity: The Ghost Dimension - (Horror, R)


BEST PLOT (in ten syllables)
1- The Martian - Man left on Mars. Has to survive. On Mars!
2- Scouts Guide to the Zombie Apocalypse - Youngsters have to survive...read the title.
3- Pan - The origin story of Peter Pan.
4- The Walk - Man walks high-wire between twin towers.
5- Rock the Kasbah - Man will try to make Afghan girl famous.
6- Our Brand is Crisis - Latin election. Girl runs the campaign.
7- Goosebumps - Monsters from Goosebumps come to life. Oh no!
8- Bridge of Spies - Spies captured. Man makes deal in the Cold War.
9- Burnt - Failed Chef. Gets second chance to be a chef.
10- Steve Jobs - The behind the scenes story of Steve Jobs.
11- Jem and the Holograms - You/tube star rises to fame. Drama ensues.
12- Crimson Peak - Girl sees ghosts. Moves in haunted house. Of course.
13- The Last Witch Hunter - Immortal Man. Fights witches. Epic War.
14- Paranormal Activity: The Ghost Dimension - Another film. This time you can see the Ghosts.


BEST TRAILER (Higher rankings if your trailer makes me care about the movie and want to watch it! So comedies, be funny. Horror movies, be scary. Action movies, don’t be lame.)
1- The Martian - (Drama Sci-fi, PG-13)
2- The Walk - (Adventure Biography, PG)
3- Crimson Peak - (Drama Horror, R)
4- Burnt - (Comedy Drama, Not Yet Rated)
5- Our Brand is Crisis - (Comedy Drama, R)
6- Rock the Kasbah - (Comedy Music, R)
7- Bridge of Spies - (Drama Thriller, PG-13)
8- Scouts Guide to the Zombie Apocalypse - (Comedy Horror, R)
9- Pan - (Adventure Family, PG)
10- Steve Jobs - (Biography, R)
11- Goosebumps - (Adventure Fantasy, PG)
12- Jem and the Holograms - (Drama Music, PG)
13- The Last Witch Hunter - (Action Fantasy, PG-13)
14- Paranormal Activity: The Ghost Dimension - (Horror, R)


COOLEST LEAD ACTOR
1- Bridge of Spies - (Tom Hanks, Forrest Gump)
2- Our Brand is Crisis - (Sandra Bullock, While You Were Sleeping)
3- Rock the Kasbah - (Bill Murray, Groundhog Day)
4- Burnt - (Bradley Cooper, The Hangover)
5- Pan - (Hugh Jackman, X-men)
6- The Martian - (Matt Damon, The Bourne Identity)
7- Crimson Peak - (Jessica Chastain from The Help)
8- The Walk - (Joseph Gordon-Levitt, Inception)
9- Goosebumps - (Jack Black from School of Rock)
10- Steve Jobs - (Michael Fassbender from X-men: First Class)
11- The Last Witch Hunter - (Vin Diesel, Fast and Furious 6)
12- Jem and the Holograms - (Aubrey Peeples, Nashville)
13- Scouts Guide to the Zombie Apocalypse - (Tye Sheridan, Mud)
14- Paranormal Activity: The Ghost Dimension - (I didn’t recognize anyone yet)


BEST CAST
1- The Martian - (Jessica Chastain, Kristen Wiig, Jeff Daniels, Michael Pena, Sean Bean, Kate Mara, Chiwetel Ejiofor)
2- Rock the Kasbah - (Bruce Willis, Zooey Deschanel, Kate Hudson, Scott Caan, Danny McBride)
3- Steve Jobs - (Kate Winslet, Seth Rogen, Jeff Daniels)
4- Burnt - (Sienna Miller, Omar Sy, Uma Thurman, Emma Thompson, Lily James)
5- The Last Witch Hunter - (Elijah Wood, Michael Caine)
6- Bridge of Spies - (Amy Ryan, Alan Alda)
7- Crimson Peak - (Tom Hiddleston, Charlie Hunnam, Mia Wasikowska)
8- Pan - (Rooney Mara, Amanda Seyfried, Garrett Hedlund)
9- Jem and the Holograms - (Molly Ringwald, Juliette Lewis, Ryan Guzman)
10- Our Brand is Crisis - (Billy Bob Thornton, Anthony Mackie, Zoe Kazan)
11- The Walk - (Ben Kingsley)
12- Goosebumps - (Amy Ryan)
13- Scouts Guide to the Zombie Apocalypse- (Cloris Leachman)
14- Paranormal Activity: The Ghost Dimension - (I didn’t recognize anyone yet)


BEST STREET CRED (what else has the director directed)
1- Bridge of Spies - (Steven Spielberg, Jurassic Park)
2- The Martian - (Ridley Scott, Gladiator)
3- Rock the Kasbah - (Barry Levinson, Rain Man)
4- The Walk - (Robert Zemeckis, Back to the Future)
5- Steve Jobs - (Danny Boyle, Slumdog Millionaire)
6- Crimson Peak - (Guillermo del Toro, Pan’s Labyrinth)
7- Pan - (Joe Wright, Pride & Prejudice)
8- Jem and the Holograms - (John M. Chu, G.I.Joe 2)
9- Goosebumps - (Rob Letterman, Gulliver’s Travels)
10- Our Brand is Crisis - (David Gordon Green, Pineapple Express)
11- The Last Witch Hunter - (Breck Eisner, Sahara)
12- Burnt - (John Wells, August: Osage County)
13- Scouts Guide to the Zombie Apocalypse- (Christopher Landon, Paranormal Activity: The Marked Ones)
14- Paranormal Activity: The Ghost Dimension - (Gregory Plotkin, his first big movie)


The Results: I’ll list the points each movie received in each of the 7 rounds. Like golf, the lowest total score will show the best movie to watch this month.


TitleGenrePlotTrailerActorCastCredTotal
The Martian321161216
Rock the Kabash525632326
Bridge of Spies438716130
The Walk7142811437
Pan233958737
Our Brand is Crisis62652101041
Burnt7394441243
Steve Jobs231010103543
Crimson Peak6312377644
Goosebumps12711912951
Scouts Guide to the Zombie Apocalypse412813131354
Jem and the Holograms331112129857
The Last Witch Hunter5213131151160
Paranormal Activity: The Ghost Dimension13141414141474





You may interpret this column for your own movie preferences. For example, if you have seen every Paranormal Activity film, feel free to watch this one too. However, if you are still on the fence, please read the following conclusions from the scientific data gathered in this column.

Conclusion 1: If you are going to see one new movie in the theaters this October, you should go and see The Martian.
Conclusion 2: If you are made of money and can see more than one movie, feel free to check out Rock the Kasbah or Bridge of Spies.
Conclusion 3: Then, depending on your taste, you may either want to watch The Walk or Pan in fourth place.
Conclusion 4: There were some big-name directors and movie stars this month! I don’t know how I was able to rank them- what would you have done?




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