This Weekend, Watch This
A comparison for the new releases for June 12-14, 2015
By Curt David
June 15, 2015
New movies are released into theaters every weekend. How do you decide which movie to watch? I’ll save you the hassle of researching every movie by comparing the new releases for each weekend in this column. Then, I’ll tell you which movie you should watch in the theaters.
Jurassic World was the only film that had a wide release last weekend. As the box office reports have announced, we all know that you already saw the movie in the theatres. Since Jurassic World automatically will win this week’s column, I have also included some scary facts comparing this year to 1993, when Jurassic Park was first released.
| Jurassic World | In 1993, when Jurrasic Park was released... |
| Clearest Title | It’s the fourth movie in the Jurassic Park franchise | A gallon of gas cost $1.12 (today: $2.49). |
Best Genre
and Rating | Sci-fi Action
Rated PG-13 for intense sequences of science-fiction violence and peril | A pound of ground beef cost $2.00 (today: $4.32) |
Best Plot
(in haiku form) | Dinosaurs at park
Creates new scary dino
Escapes. Eats people | A dozen eggs cost $0.97 (today: $2.06) |
| Best Trailer | PROS: Looks great, nostalgic trailer, dinosaurs!
CONS: Perhaps none (other than bad taste still left by Jurassic Park II and III) | A gallon of milk cost $2.48 (today: $3.40) |
| Coolest Lead Actor | Chris Pratt from Guardians of the Galaxy and Parks and Rec. | A pound of coffee cost $2.47 (today: $4.99) |
| Best Cast | Bryce Dallas Howard from The Help and Spider-Man 3 | A new house cost $113,200 (today: $289,500) |
Best Street Cred
For the Production | Director Colin Trevorrow also directed Safety Not Guaranteed | A cost of a movie ticket $4.14 (today: $8.17) |
So out of a maximum of 7 points per movie, Jurassic World of course scores 7 points and a gold star.
You may interpret this column for your own movie preferences. For example, if you don’t want to watch one of the biggest movies of all-time, feel free to skip this one. However, if you are still on the fence, please read the following conclusions from the scientific data gathered in this column.
Conclusion 1: On paper, Jurassic World is the best movie to watch this weekend.
Conclusion 2: Each week I give a gold star to the movie with the best tagline. Jurassic World’s “The park is open” wins this week.
Conclusion 3: Thank you to the Bureau of Labor Statistics, National Association of Theatre Owners, and Thepeoplehistory.com for my facts this week.
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