This Weekend, Watch This

A comparison for the new releases for July 11-13, 2014

By Curt David

July 11, 2014

I bet that LeBron...plays basketball in some city next year.

New at BOP:
Share & Save
Digg Button  
Print this column
New movies are released into theaters every weekend. How do you decide which movie to watch? Some movies sound awesome (Dracula 2000), but then do not do too well commercially. Other movies star your celebrity crush (Rachel McAdams in The Vow), but then do not get much love critically. Still other movies are recommended by friends (but friends can be idiots). And if you are like 22%* of people, you are not even aware of which movies are being released, yet alone which movies you should pay your hard earned money on.

I’ll save you the hassle of researching every movie, by comparing the new releases for each weekend in this column. Then I’ll tell you which movie you should watch in the theaters.

For the weekend of July 11th, the only new movie in wide release is Dawn of the Planet of the Apes. Since I want some type of competition, I’ll compare it to the small movie Begin Again, which has expanded to some more theaters this weekend.







Dawn of the Planet of the Apes Begin AgainWINNER
(1 point per category)
Clearest TitleThe title tells me it’s the sequel to Rise of the Planet of the ApesThe title doesn’t give me much to go onThe monkeys get the first point.
Best Genre
and Rating
Sci-Fi Action
Rated PG-13 for intense sequences of sci-fi violence and action, and brief strong language
Music Drama
Rated R for language
The different movies will each score 1/2 point.
Best Plot
(in haiku form)
Apes took over world
Want to live at peace with us
Will fight if provoked
Girl writes song lyrics
Man wants her to make record
They collaborate
The apes get another point.
Best TrailerPROS: Amazing special effects, like apes riding horses
CONS: May not have a happy ending, but it looks like a good movie
PROS: Keira Knightley in a movie like “Once”
CONS: None- you had me at Keira Knightley
Both great trailers. They’ll split the point again.
Coolest Lead ActorAndy Serkis who is the actor behind Caesar the monkey, King Kong, and Gollum. Keira Knightley from Pirates of the Caribbean and Bend it like Beckham. I love them both. Another split point!
Best CastGary Oldman (The Dark Knight) and Keri Russell (Felicity)Mark Ruffalo (The Avengers) and Adam Levine, Mos Def, and CeeLoBegin Again’s cast is amazing, and has street cred of their own. Point.
Best Street Cred
For the Production
Director Matt Reeves also directed Cloverfield, Let Me In, and actually some episodes of Felicity. Writer and Director John Carney also wrote and directed Once. Both talented men. 1/2 point each.




So out of a maximum of 7 points per movie, Dawn of the Planet of the Apes scores 4 points and Begin Again scores 3 points (and a gold star).

You may interpret this column for your own movie preferences. For example, if you liked the movie Once, you have to watch Begin Again. However, if you are still on the fence, please read the following conclusions from the scientific data gathered in this column.

Conclusion 1: On paper, Dawn of the Planet of the Apes is the best movie to watch this weekend (but Begin Again looks really good too!!!!)
Conclusion 2: Each week I give a gold star to the movie with the best tagline. I couldn’t find a tagline for the primates, but Begin Again’s winning tagline works for either film, “You’re only as strong as your next move.”
Conclusion 3: Every February, the contributors to Box Office Prophets vote for their Calvin Awards (like the site’s Oscars). The Calvins are my favorite time of year. And as far as I know, there has been no inter-office campaigning for the Calvin Awards. Until now. I am officially starting my campaign to have Andy Serkis win the Best Actor Award for the Calvins.

*Statistic is completely made up.




Advertisement


     


 
 

Need to contact us? E-mail a Box Office Prophet.
Friday, March 29, 2024
© 2024 Box Office Prophets, a division of One Of Us, Inc.