This Weekend, Watch This

A comparison for the new releases for November 30 - December 2, 2012

By Curt David

November 30, 2012

Ugh.

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New movies are released into theaters every weekend. How do you decide which movie to watch? Some people could pick a movie based on the title (be careful which version of Jack Frost you rent). Some people watch trailers (misleading), some people listen to their friends (friends can be idiots), and some people only go to the movies if their Hollywood crush is on the screen (My alphabetical actress crush list...U is for Ursula Andress).

More likely than not, each weekend there is a movie that you have never heard of in the theaters. I'll save you the hassle of researching every movie by comparing the new releases for each weekend in this column. Then, I'll tell you which movie to watch.

For the weekend of November 23rd, the new movie in wide release is Killing Them Softly and a smaller wide release in The Collection.


Killing Them SoftlyThe CollectionWinner
(One point per category)
Clearest TitleIntriguing Title. Don’t know what it means. Generic Title. Don’t know what it means. These days, every movie is two words and starts with “The.” Point for the intriguing title.
Best Genre
and Rating
Crime/Drama
Rated R for violence, sexual references, pervasive language, and some drug use.
Horror
Rated R for strong bloody violence, grisly images, language, and brief nudity.
This weekend, every movie is Rated R. 1/2 point for each movie.
Cleverest Tagline
(out of 5 stars)
N/A

0/5 - The title is pretty cool despite lack of tagline.
“Every great collector has a vision”

1/5 - Interestingly creepy, because it doesn’t sound horror-ish.
These days, where are the good taglines like, “In space no one can hear you scream.” I guess The Collection will win this point.
Best Part of TrailerUmm, it seemed like a mobster movie, then the music made it seem like an inspirational movie. These gruesome horror movies don’t do it for me. This weekend, I guess Killing Them Softly has the Best Trailer. Point.
Coolest Lead ActorBrad Pitt from se7en, Fight Club, and Inglourious Basterds. Emma Fitzpatrick from The Social Network and In Time. These days, Brad Pitt is pretty famous. Point for him.
Best CastJames Gandolfini (Sopranos), Ray Liotta (Goodfellas), and Richard Jenkins (The Visitor) The other actors are not recognizable, yet. This weekend, the guy from Sopranos is back in theaters. Point for him.
Best Street Cred
For the Production
Writer and Director Andrew Dominik also wrote and directed The Assassination of Jesse James by the Coward Robert Ford. Writer and Director Marcus Dunstan also wrote several Saw movies and the Piranha 3DD movie. These days, a lot of writers are becoming directors. I’ll let these two guys split the point.



So out of a maximum of 7 points per movie, Killing Me Softly scores 5 points and The Collection scores 2 points.

You may interpret this column for your own movie preferences. For example, if you don’t want to watch a Rated R movie, feel free to watch Wreck-It Ralph. However, if you are still on the fence, please read the following conclusions from the scientific data gathered in this column.

Conclusion 1: On paper, Killing Them Softly is the best movie to watch this weekend.
Conclusion 2: I’m not super thrilled about the movies this weekend, but I recently got excited to see Silver Linings Playbook. Check out that trailer.
Conclusion 3: It was tough for me to think of a “U” crush name for the beginning of my column. Anyone have any ideas for the letter “Y” that’s coming up? (First or last name)



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