This Weekend, Watch This

A comparison for the new releases for March 30th

By Curt David

March 30, 2012

Archery is all the rage.

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New movies are released into theaters every weekend. How do you decide which movie to watch? Some people could pick a movie based on the title (Surprisingly, Patriot Games, The Crying Game, and Gamer all have different genres). Some people watch trailers (misleading), some people listen to their friends (friends can be idiots), and some people only go to the movies if their Hollywood crush is on the screen (11 weeks until I can see Catherine Zeta-Jones on screen again!).

More likely than not, each weekend there is a movie that you have never heard of in the theaters. I'll save you the hassle of researching every movie, by comparing the new releases for each weekend in this column. Then, I'll tell you which movie to watch.

For the weekend of March 30th, the new movies in wide release are Mirror Mirror and Wrath of the Titans.


Mirror MirrorWrath of the TitansWINNER (1 point per category)
Clearest TitleSounds Snow White-ish. Sounds Clash of the Titans sequel-ish. A sequel usually wins this round. Point for Titans.
Best Genre and RatingAdventure/Fantasy: Rated PG for some fantasy action and mild rude humor. Action/Fantasy: Rated PG-13 for intense sequences of fantasy action and violence. Similar genres, so each movie will win a similar 1/2 point for this round.
Cleverest Tagline (out of 5 stars)"One bad apple." 3/5 Clever, especially with the picture of an evil Julia Roberts! "Feel the wrath." 1/5. This tagline doesn't do it for me. Feel the wrath? Come on. The infinitely better apple tagline wins this round.
Best Part of TrailerIt was clever and easy to watch. Crazy special effects, awesome monsters, epic. Crazy special effects are in every movie. While I wouldn't want to watch a Snow White movie, the trailer had substance. Point for Snow White.
Coolest Lead ActorJulia Roberts from My Best Friend's Wedding, Erin Brockovich, and Pretty Woman. Sam Worthington from Avatar, Clash of the Titans, and Terminator Salvation. While I wanted Sam to be nominated for an Oscar for Avatar (for real), Julia Roberts is still the epitome of a lead actor. Point for her.
Best CastLily Collins (little sister from The Blind Side), Armie Hammer (twin from The Social Network), Nathan Lane (Producers), and Sean Bean (Lord of the Rings)Liam Neeson (Taken), Ralph Fiennes (Harry Potter), and Bill Nighy (Love Actually). I think Liam and Ralph can run circles around the cast of Mirror, Mirror. Point for the Titans.
Best Street Cred For the productionDirector Tarsem Singh has also directed The Cell and Immortals. Director Jonathan Liebesman has also directed Battle Los Angeles and Texas Chainsaw Massacre: The Beginning. Both directors are starting to earn their street cred. This weekend could help them. They'll split the point for now.



So out of a maximum of 7 points per movie, Mirror Mirror scores 4 points and Wrath of the Titans scores 3 points.

You may interpret this column for your own movie preferences. For example, if you watch every action movie that comes out in 3D, feel free to watch Wrath of the Titans. However, if you are still on the fence, please read the following conclusions from the scientific data gathered in this column.

Conclusion 1: On paper, Mirror Mirror is the best movie to watch this weekend.
Conclusion 2: Liam Neeson and Ralph Fiennes also starred in Schindler's List together.
Conclusion 3: I thoroughly approved of The Hunger Games movie.



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