This Weekend, Watch This

A comparison of the new releases for February 24, 2012

By Curt David

February 24, 2012

Dig *up*, stupid!

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New movies are released into theaters every weekend. How do you decide which movie to watch? Some people could pick a movie based on the title (Surprisingly, The Princess Diaries, The Basketball Diaries, and Diary of a Wimpy Kid all have different genres). Some people watch trailers (misleading), some people listen to their friends (friends can be idiots), and some people only go to the movies if their Hollywood crush is on the screen (four weeks until my book-crush The Hunger Games comes to theatres!).

More likely than not, each weekend there is a movie that you have never heard of in the theaters. I'll save you the hassle of researching every movie, by comparing the new releases for each weekend in this column. Then, I'll tell you which movie to watch.

For the weekend of February 24th, the new movies in wide release are Act of Valor, Gone, Good Deeds, and Wanderlust.







Act of Valor Gone Good Deeds Wanderlust WINNER (1 point per category)
Clearest TitleI don't know? I don't know? I don't know? I don't know? These titles don't tell me anything. All four will split the point four ways.
Best Genre
and Rating
Action:

Rated R for strong violence, including some torture, and for language.
Thriller:

Rated PG-13 for violence and terror, some sexual material, brief language and drug use.
Dramedy:

Rated PG-13 for sexual content, language, some violence, and thematic material.
Comedy: Rated R for sexual content, graphic nudity, language, and drug use. Nothing stands out to me in this row. Another 1/4th of a point all around.
Cleverest Tagline
(out of 5 stars)
The only easy day was yesterday.

I don't get it, but it sounds good.

2/5
"No one believes her. Nothing will stop her."

Good summary, not the greatest tagline

1/5
"Wesley Deeds is About to Discover the Person He Was Meant to Be"

Didn't do it for me

0/5
"Leave your baggage behind"

Sounds freeing.

2/5
What? Not one tagline could get to three stars- they'll all split losing the point this round.
Best Part of TrailerIt had a realistic Navy Seal type of feel. Kind of suspenseful. Kind of Inspirational Interesting premise. I didn't laugh much. These trailers are fine, but not one made me super care. All split the point. (shoot, Debbie Downer has taken over the column this week.)
Coolest Lead ActorThe trailer said all the characters were Navy SEALs?! Amanda Seyfried from Mamma Mia!, Dear John, and Red Riding Hood. Tyler Perry from Diary of a Mad Black Woman and I can do Bad all by Myself. Jennifer Aniston from Friends, Office Space, and Horrible Bosses. Score, finally a round I like! And I like all four choices. Let's split the point four ways for a fifth time!
Best CastThe trailer was wrong, because this movie seemed to have a lot of actors in it. Maybe the Seals are extras? Jennifer Carpenter (Dexter), Daniel Sunjata (All My Children), Thandie Newton (Crash), Gabrielle Union (Bring it On), Rebecca Romijn (X-men), and Phylicia Rashad (The Cosby Show) Paul Rudd (Role Models), Justin Theroux (Charlie's Angels II), Alan Alda (MASH), Kerri Kenney (Reno 911), and Michaela Watkins (SNL) Now we get interesting, cause only Good Deeds and Wanderlust will split this point.
Best Street Cred
For the Production
Writer Kurt Johnstad also wrote 300. Writer Allison Burnett also wrote Underworld: Awakening and Untraceable. Director, Writer, Actor Tyler Perry has done those things for all of his films. Writer and director David Wain also wrote and directed Role Models. And Tyler Perry has the most street cred. Sole winner of this point.



So out of a maximum of 7 points per movie, Good Deeds scores 2 and 3/4 points, Wanderlust scores 1 and 3/4 points, and Gone and Act of Valor each score 1 and 1/4 points.

You may interpret this column for your own movie preferences. For example, if you want to watch a movie that everyone's talking about, feel free to watch a movie that was released two weekends ago. However, if you are still on the fence, please read the following conclusions from the scientific data gathered in this column.

Conclusion 1: On paper, Good Deeds is the best movie to watch this weekend.
Conclusion 2: But you should really pick your favorite genre and watch that movie instead.
Conclusion 3: Next week, I will return to this column, hopefully with more joy and decisiveness.






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