This Weekend Watch This
A comparison of the new releases for November 4, 2011
By Curt David
November 4, 2011
New movies are released into theaters every weekend. How do you decide which movie to watch? Some people could pick a movie based on the title (Surprisingly, Hellboy, Drag Me to Hell, and The Devil Wears Prada all have different genres). Some people watch trailers (misleading), some people listen to their friends (friends can be idiots), and some people only go to the movies if their Hollywood crush is on the screen (I'm going on a movie strike until Catherine Zeta-Jones comes back to theaters).
More likely than not, each weekend there is a movie that you have never heard of in the theaters. I'll save you the hassle of researching every movie, by comparing the new releases for each weekend in this column. Then, I'll tell you which movie to watch.
For the weekend of November 4th, the movies in wide release are Tower Heist and A Very Harold & Kumar 3D Christmas. .
| Tower Heist | A Very Harold & Kumar 3D Christmas | WINNER
(1 point per category)
|
| Clearest Title | Some people will be stealing something from a tower. | Another sequel to the Harold & Kumar movies. | Sequels do well in this round because they have recognizable titles. Point for H&K. |
Best Genre
and Rating | Comedy:
Rated PG-13 for language and sexual content.
| Comedy:
Rated R for strong crude and sexual content, graphic nudity, perverse language, drug use, and some violence.
| Boooo. I hate it when the same genres are released the same week. Each movie will lose this round and split the point. |
Cleverest Tagline
(out of 5 stars) | "Ordinary guys. An extraordinary robbery"
Booo. That's not a funny tagline.
1/5
| "Christmas comes prematurely."
Ha. Because the movie is being released in November. No other meaning here.
4/5
| H&K has redeemed itself since the fiasco of 30 seconds ago. Point for a funny and singular meaning tagline. |
| Best Part of Trailer | I didn't laugh, but it seems entertaining. | I didn't laugh, and it didn't seem entertaining. | Man, trailer let down. Tower Heist was my favorite. Point. |
| Coolest Lead Actor | Ben Stiller from Zoolander, Night at the Museum, and the Fockers trilogy. | Neil Patrick Harris (who is the third lead actor) from How I Met Your Mother, and Doogie Howser, M.D. | Both cool comedic actors, both will win this round and split the point. |
| Best Cast | Eddie Murphy (Dr. Dolittle), Casey Affleck (Gone Baby Gone), Matthew Broderick (Ferris Bueller's Day Off), Gabourey Sidibe (Precious), and Alan Alda (M*A*S*H) | Kal Penn (Kumar), John Cho (Star Trek), and Danny Trejo (Grindhouse) | Yeah M*A*S*H. Point for Tower Heist. |
Best Street Cred
For the Production | Director Brett Ratner also directed Red Dragon, the Rush Hour trilogy, and X-Men 3 | Writers Jon Hurwitz and Hayden Schlossberg also wrote the other Harold & Kumar films. | Despite not liking the fact two main characters died in X-men 3, I'll still give Brett the point for the best street cred. |
So out of a maximum of 7 points per movie, Tower Heist scores 4 points and A Very Harold & Kumar 3D Christmas scores 3 points.
You may interpret this column for your own movie preferences. For example, if you liked the first two Harold & Kumar movies, feel free to watch the third. However, if you are still on the fence, please read the following conclusions from the scientific data gathered in this column.
Conclusion 1: On paper, Tower Heist is the best movie to watch this weekend.
Conclusion 2: I'm a big fan of M*A*S*H. In fact, last time I played Trivia Pursuit, I answered this question correctly, "What is the character's name of the priest on the show M*A*S*H?"
Conclusion 3: Robert Downey Sr. plays Judge Ramos in Tower Heist.
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