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The chefs take to Arthur Ashe Stadium at the US Open…aaaaaaand? Okay, where are the tennis people? There’s no Nadal, no Federer, no Murray, no Williams Sisters. What’s the point of this challenge? Apparently, the cheftestants will be cooking in front of tennis fans (underwhelming) and will NOT be serving tennis players, but instead will be serving the big, fat judges.

So, ummm, what was the point of having this at the US Open, again?

Okay, okay, so they’ll be serving ONE pro tennis player: Taylor Dent. What? You’ve never heard of the guy? I’m not surprised. Even in the tennis community, Taylor Dent is usually better known as “that guy that used to be fat.”

Welps, he’s gonna get all he can eat in a few minutes. Padma calls for Team Yellow and Team Orange to send out their first dish. Fabio is up first for Team Orange. Team Drama (ooops, I mean, Team Yellow) quickly congregate and based on their strategy from the night before, they want to send out their weakest dish (to “waste” the other side’s strongest dish). This would be, according to Spike, Jamie’s dish. After all, her chickpeas are still as hard as the tennis balls that would be flying around if they were cooking at the US Open (oh wait, they ARE at the US Open . . . .).

Jamie (smartly, I think) refuses to go out first because she wants her chickpeas to have more time to cook, so Casey steps out. Casey serves up a grilled pork tenderloin with farro while Fabio has whole wheat gnocchi. Taylor, Padma and Tom all go with Fabio and he wins the point for his team.

At this point, Fabio loses it. Granted, he’s been on the verge of elimination for the past couple of episodes, but ass-like behavior is ass-like behavior. He whoops, he falls to the ground, he screams, he cries. I start to wonder whether or not he’d just won an Oscar for Life Is Beautiful.

Team Orange was supposed to send Marcel out next, but Dale’s dumplings are dying and he needs to serve them up. Marcel (big surprise) gets pissy.

Team Drama needs to figure out who to send up; Angelo unilaterally decides to dump their strategy. He wants some freakin’ momentum. He sends Tiffani out there. Tiffani serves up black bass sashimi with avocado, while Dale presents a dumpling with spicy carrot. Gail votes for Tiffani, Padma goes with Dale, Tom goes with Tiffani and so does Taylor. The score is now 15-15.

Next, Angelo from Team Drama takes on Marcel from Team Orange. Angelo has a smoked fish with yuzu gelee while Marcel has a cauliflower couscous with pomegranate seeds. Tom, Padma and Gail all vote for Angelo and Team Drama takes a 30-15 lead.

Jamie has hidden herself in a corner. She doesn’t want to serve her dish.

Meanwhile, Angelo is starting to panic and starts messing with everyone’s dishes on his team. Can we say “power hungry”?

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