New at BOP: Review: Matrix Resurrections Movie Review: Moonfall Movie Reviews: Scream The #1 Movie in America November Forecast The Many Saints of Newark October Forecast New Trivia Question All site updates Share & Save   Tweet Print this column

With their elimination last week, New Jersey volleyballers Katie & Rachel brought more pop culture shame to the Garden State in the fine tradition of Snooki and The Situation. I really thought they would be better at the race but the girls disappointed on virtually every leg.

Back to the people who are doing well (or at least not bad enough to be eliminated), we are in land of perpetual sunlight Norway. First off the mat are doctors Nat & Kat and they note that it is 8:26 at night and still sunny. This doesn’t strike me as particularly phenomenal because Texas summers offer hot days and a post-9 p.m. sunset regularly. They explain that they are used to competing with men and they WILL be the first all-female team to win the race. Given how they have run pretty smart and well so far, I can see them doing it (even though I pegged them to be one of the first few teams gone).

The ladies tear into the clue and find out they are heading to St. Petersburg, Russia, via a train to Stockholm, Sweden, and then a plane ride to mother Russia. As they arrive at the train ticket office, they find out that the first train out will be at 10:26 the next morning. So, all the teams will be riding the rails together and I am spared breaking down departure times for each team. The teams will be settling in for a long ride as, according to Yahoo! Maps, it is nearly 900 miles from Narvik, Norway, to Stockholm.

With Jill excited about riding the train, she innocently asks boyfriend Thomas if he had ever ridden a train like this before. With arrogance, he smugly replies, “Yeah, of course,” which I can only assume means, “Of course I have. I went to Notre Dame, so I am cultured in the ways of mass transportation. You would know this if you didn’t go to beauty school.” Even though that is all we are shown of the conversation, I think that Thomas will continue to keep the “Fighting” in the “Fighting Irish.”

Cut to the sorority row train compartment and we see that Team HSN Brook & Claire and doctors Nat & Kat have giddily settled in. They have begun the bizarre "game" of smelling each other’s shoes and socks. Apparently, Brook’s bunions are the worst offenders. Nat notes they like HSN because they are positive people and that this was probably her favorite part of the race so far. Sounds to me like someone is pretty starved for acceptance, if a train ride with people you have known for a couple weeks tops all the places you have been and once-in-a-lifetime things you have done on a race for a million dollars.

At the juncture of train and plane in Stockholm, we get another frantic rush of teams scrambling for cabs to the airport, only to find out that they will all be on the same flight. While transportation is a Godsend for the viewer because it makes the race more competitive, I suspect the teams aren’t too pleased that they can’t broaden the gap between each other. Speaking of not too pleased, unaware that the airport will be a leveling of the playing field, Chad reverts back to his default emotion of "anger" because they are the last ones looking for a cab at the train station. And who is at fault in his eyes? Stephanie, of course, who he says took too long to get ready. As long as Chad’s default attitude is that it’s always her fault whenever he gets frustrated, Stephanie notes, “We have a long road ahead of us.” Amen, sister.

Continued:       1       2       3       4       5