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Gary & Mallory are the opposite scenario and hit the mat in second place. They are greeted with the arched eyebrow of Phil, who doesn’t say they are second but rather does his magic eyebrow trick twice to tell their place. Phil is apparently part horse.

While Vicki dominated the Roadblock, Nick confidently explains that he has been competing on BMX bikes since he was 12, so they will definitely be doing Bike. The physical challenge-averse Stephanie decides that she and Chad will be doing Boat.

In a beautiful example of misplaced hubris, BMX Bandit Nick falls over a few times and gets winded so he has to push the bike. All the while, Vicki is having no problem but is being very supportive of Nick. That’s okay, Nick, I can say that I have been playing golf for about 15 years but I still suck. Sorry I’m not as encouraging as Vicki.

Brook & Claire continue their bizarre/unsanitary side project of kissing everyone as they get their clue directing them to the Pitstop.

A still lost Michael & Kevin are now following Jill & Thomas in a true case of the blind leading the blind. But their wanderings do have one benefit – duping volleyballers Rachel & Katie into thinking they still have a chance. Rachel incorrectly assumes that Jill & Thomas passed the bridge still looking for the Roadblock clue. Katie finishes the Roadblock and when they reach the Detour, there are two cars and they naively say, “Maybe we can pass another team.” Isn’t it so cute that they think they have actually done well this leg?

Finally, Thomas is able to flag down a car and get correct directions to the marina. Michael & Kevin are still drafting off them and look to follow them the entire home to the mat. Both teams hoof it to the mat with the dating couple in third and the father and son in fourth. Despite smacking herself in the face with the car door and getting Phil’s admiration for staying upbeat, Brook gets to mat with Claire in fifth place.

Vicki & Nick have no issues with finding the marina but Nick is obviously oblivious about what is going on around them as he mutters walking up to the mat “I think we’re second.” How about sixth? And during the rest period between legs, you should probably brush up on the tasks, clues and vernacular of the Amazing Race.

As they are heading back to their car, Chad & Stephanie pass the girls on their way to the dock. The producers try their best to edit in the dating team needing to ask for directions with shots of the volleyballers leaving the Detour but the writing has been on the wall the whole episode. Chad & Stephanie once again eke by and live to race another day with a seventh place finish.

This means that the team I pegged to be the first all-female team to win The Amazing Race is the fourth team eliminated. I am bummed that I was so wrong about them but without an equalizing factor like an airport or public transportation, the girls only really stood a chance of passing Chad & Stephanie. All the other teams were nearly an hour and a half ahead of them.

Next week brings us some Russian fun and Brook stepping in poo. I can’t wait.

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