Trailer Hitch

By Eric Hughes

December 9, 2009

Let's hope the CGI is better this time around.

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Welcome to Trailer Hitch, BOP's look at the latest movie trailers to hit the Internet. This week: Parkour! Also, titans clash, Richard Gere plays a cop and Adam Sandler and his knucklehead friends spend the Fourth of July together.

District 13: Ultimatum – Opens February 5, 2010

Thanks to The Office, I had reason at the beginning of District 13: Ultimatum's trailer to chuckle. It is, of course, its reference to parkour, a physical discipline all the way from France where the object is to get from one place to another using only the human body and objects in the environment. Parkour enthusiasts negotiate through obstacles in the most efficient way possible, as if in emergency. The term, and Michael, Dwight and Andy's lame attempt at replicating the popular discipline, is the subject of the cold open to the current season's premiere episode, "Gossip." It happens to be one of my favorite gags of season six.

Unfortunately for District 13: Ultimatum, the sequel to the French movie you've never heard of, District 13, similarities between it and The Office end there as District 13: Ultimatum is a bloated actioner – and not much else. Though District 13 boasts a strong 80% approval rating on Rotten Tomatoes, the sequel appears to lack the necessary substance for me to care even a little bit about the project.

The film is about an elite police officer and a reformed vigilante who team up to save District 13, a ghetto filled with murderers and drug lords.

Grade: D

Clash of the Titans – Opens March 26, 2010

Having not seen the original 1981 movie on which Clash of the Titans is based, I can't say how the original holds up against its ‘80s era predecessor. What I can say is the teaser to the Sam Worthington-starrer looks pretty promising, even if it plays very heavily on the genre – sci-fi – that I generally avoid. Directed by Louis Leterrier (Transporter 2, The Incredible Hulk (the Ed Norton one)), Clash of the Titans follows Perseus, a god raised as a man who's helpless to save his family from Hades (Ralph Fiennes), before Hades seizes power from Zeus (Liam Neeson) and unleashes literal hell on Earth. To take down the vengeful god, Perseus strikes up a band of warriors to battle Guillermo del Toro-esque beasts that stand in the path to Hades.

From what we get here in the teaser, Clash of the Titans reminds me a bit of 300 mixed with a movie like Star Wars (or even Hellboy since I brought up del Toro). The movie plays upon the otherworldly in the look of its villains, while remaining grounded in reality through the brotherhood among Perseus' men.

Grade: C-

Brooklyn's Finest – Opens March 5, 2010

Known in the industry as the first film to sell at Sundance (to Overture Films) earlier this year, Brooklyn's Finest stars Richard Gere, Ethan Hawke and Don Cheadle as three unrelated and completely unconnected cops who find themselves at the same deadly location on a particular day in Brooklyn after enduring differing career paths. The pic comes from scribe Michael C. Martin, a former subway traffic guard in New York.




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The trailer to Brooklyn's Finest feels frustratingly scattered to me – as if there's too much story to tell in too little time. (This for sure isn't a huge shocker, as we're dealing with three interconnected storylines here). And its soundtrack, principally "Run This Town" by Jay-Z, Rihanna and Kanye West, is chopped up finer than an Emeril Lagasse garlic clove. (Forgive me: is Emeril even relevant anymore?). To the unbeknownst listener, little problems with the song will be had. But to those familiar to the beat, its slide into and out of the preview feels uneven.

Even with my small reservations (and a horrible release date; just a week or two after the 2010 Oscars), I'm going to go ahead and put a little faith in the project. Ethan Hawke is usually very good to me, and Wesley Snipes in particular is looking as bad ass as ever.

Grade: B

Grown Ups – Opens June 25, 2010

Adam Sandler, Chris Rock, Rob Schneider, David Spade and Kevin James are such wild cards in my book that any movie co-starring all of ‘em seems like it couldn't turn out to be anything other than a disaster. Well, the results are in. And, as expected, I'm completely undecided.

On the one hand, you've got Kevin James doing ridiculous physical comedy, namely swinging on a rope, running into a tree and plummeting Homer Simpson-style to the forest floor below. (It's destined to be a highlight of summer 2010, if not the entire year). On the other hand, you've got Rob Schneider's character, who's not only wed to a super cougar (read: wayyyy older than him), but also carries little to no shame in promptly making out with her in front of his buds.

The movie features the five aforementioned actors as friends and former basketball teammates who reunite after many years apart to honor the death of their childhood basketball coach. Over a Fourth of July weekend at a lake house, the boys learn that not much has changed about their overall dynamic, even if they've aged considerably since the last time they were all together.
I can't seem to wrap my head around a good movie coming out of this. Nor do I see a completely dreadful project (along the lines of this year's surprisingly lucrative Couples Retreat). A C grade feels safe and average.

Grade: C


     


 
 

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