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Winner: Sean Penn

He won. That's why. As BOP's Calvin Trager points out, the very exclusive list of men who have more than one Academy Award for Lead Actor are: "Frederic March (whoever that is), Spencer Tracy, Marlon Brando, Gary Cooper, Dustin Hoffman, Jack Nicholson, Tom Hanks, Daniel Day Lewis, and now Penn." Penn also managed to thank his wife using some subterfuge involving the modifying of her ethnicity. Princess Buttercup is Japanese. Who knew?

Winning Loser: Mickey Rourke

Despite not winning the award last night, the man who became infamous in the early 1990s for hitting women has finally regained celebrity in spite of his crippling personality flaws. A six minute acceptance speech at the Independent Film Awards on Saturday evening reminded people what it is about Rourke that makes him so engaging. He is among the most sincere talents in the industry, for better and for worse. People always know where they stand with the man, a rarity in this industry. While his career resurrection failed to capture a Best Actor title, Rourke garnered public sympathy for his emotional response to the loss of his dog and his classy request to give Eric Roberts a similar opportunity at a second chance. His willingness to pay it forward should sustain his momentum, particularly if his next project is something huge like the on again/off again role in Iron Man 2.

Shakiest Winner: Kate Winslet

We have finally found the Achilles heel of one of the greatest actresses of our generation. She is not a sound extemporaneous public speaker. In fact, she's something of a train wreck. Somehow, this makes her even more adorable, though.

Most Supportive Parent: Kate Winslet's Dad

All of those whistling lessons finally paid off for the man last night. As his daughter attempted to maintain her composure, she asked for a noise from the crowd in order to reassure her. A high-pitched blast from up in the skybox provided a laugh for everyone and managed to calm down a woman whose emotions had been controlling her. That's what the best parents do. They always let their child know they are not alone. Your mileage may vary, but that was my favorite moment of the evening.

Most Heart-wrenching Parents: The Ledgers

As the video of their acceptance speech takes its place in the annals of YouTube, what will stand out on replay is how many celebrities fight off tears as they speak. No matter what any of them thought of Ledger as a talent or a person, all of them immediately identified with the pain of a relatively young looking couple seeking to come to terms with the shocking death of their child. It's a pain that all of us fear the most in life and they had to re-live it in front of hundreds of millions of people. They did so with honor, with dignity and with love. If only they had beaten up Bill Maher on their way off the stage.

Winner: Acceptance Speeches

Almost no one had their speech cut short by a musical sign-off. That may be historically unprecedented for the show and it comes on the heels of last year's ceremony, which might as well have been sponsored by the STFU Orchestra (which has no affiliation to Brian Setzer). There were also a couple of truly winning speeches, particularly from the writer of Milk, all the Slumdoggers and especially the family of Heath Ledger.

Loser: The Orchestra

Dudes, when someone more famous than you is talking, you are not supposed to be playing. As we speak, Reese Witherspoon is having all of your cars wired to explode the next time you turn the ignition. And she is right to do so.

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