Take Five
By George Rose
July 28, 2009
The Running Man (1987) – watched/written on July 19, 2009
My head feels as though it's going to explode from the insanity that was last night at the Chios club, After. Most clubs in America close at 2:00 a.m. In Greece, they close at around 7:00 a.m, just after the sun has come up. Even though I'm hardwired for a good time, as the result of dating a bartender for most of my college experience, I could barely keep up with the non-stop bottle service that comes with being friends with the club owner's nephew. Today I woke up at 4:00 p.m, just in time to get in a movie before my siblings arrive at 8:00 p.m.
Because my brain was barely functioning, I figured I'd pick a fun, mindless action movie. Instead, it appears I only picked a mindless one. Why is it that Stephen King, the legendary writer, has betrayed me once again? The Running Man is an adaption of his work, and while it is not nearly as bad as Pet Sematary (a film I watched and reviewed in my last article), it was still not at all what I expected from a bestselling author like him. Throw in Arnold Schwarzenegger and you have yourself a monster hit in the making, right? No, not even close.
I'd say you need to watch the movie to know the plot but they give it away in the first five seconds. Before the movie starts, text begins scrolling up the screen to inform the viewer that it is the year 2017, a time when the world economy has collapsed, resources are in short supply, the police rule with absolute force, TV and all media is censored, and "The Running Man" is the most popular show on television. Naturally, there is an underground resistance trying to stop all of this. Why wouldn't there be? This plot feels so overdone already that I would have walked away from the movie right then and there, but my hangover prevented any sort of real movement on my part.
Then we meet Ben Richards (Schwarzenegger), a cop who refuses to take an order to terminate the lives of many unarmed, hungry rioting citizens. Going against the iron fist puts him directly in front of it, and within ten minutes he is sent to and escapes from a detaining zone for the unruly and unresponsive. Just before killing one of the guards, he raises him up into the air and says, "give you a lift?" It is right then and there that I realize this movie is going to be among the more cheesy 1980s action movies stuffed with one-liners.
After his escape, he meets Amber (Maria Conchita Alonso), a woman living in the apartment where his brother once resided. She turns him in to the police, where he is then offered a deal: become a contestant on "The Running Man" or your friends will die. We already know he's a good man so we know exactly what his answer will be, and he volunteers to be one of the latest "convicts" to attempt surviving the battle arenas of the show, where gladiators hunt and kill criminals for our viewing pleasure. I swear this movie had been remade a thousand times. Death Race with Jason Statham comes to mind.
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