"That's a nice-a donut."

Friday, July 14, 2006


Superman Returns (2006)

Though last year's Batman Begins eventually was given its fair due as a solid, well-told and generally well-made comic book adventure, it did take a while for the box office and popular opinion to look good. After all, Joel Schumacher nearly single-handedly destroyed the Batman franchise with the poor Batman Forever and then the abysmal Batman and Robin, certainly on a short list of worst films ever. It was going to take a lot to get rid of the bad taste. And in trying to revamp the Superman movie franchise, DC Comic and Warner Bros. had a similar obstacle to overcome with Superman Returns: 1987's Superman IV: The Quest for Peace. Of course, to be fair, that 19 year gap is far more than the 8 years until Batman was revived. And, in reality, an ever bigger obstacle is that the concept of Superman just isn't as cool as it used to be. Director Bryan Singer jumped shipped from the proven and profitable X-Men series to try to inject new life into the character. It is a commendable effort, but the final result is that the film can't overcome a poor plot and a cast of characters that in no way lives up to the standards set by Christopher Reeve and company.

The setup for the story is that five years have passed (since Superman II) and Superman left Earth to return to his original home and see for himself the planetary remains of Krypton. He comes crashing back, and soon - as his alternate identity of Clark Kent (Brandon Routh) - gets his old job back as a newspaper reporter at the Daily Planet in Metropolis. It's not all good news though as he soon finds out that his longtime crush Lois Lane (Kate Bosworth) is engaged, has a kid, and even wrote a Pulitzer Prize-winning essay on why the world no longer needs Superman. The Man of Steel quickly makes his triumphant return though, as he ends up saving a plane full of passengers in what, unfortunately, ends up being the film's best and most exciting scene. It is all down hill from there. Nemesis Lex Luthor (Kevin Spacey) returns and comes up with yet another plan to make himself rich, which potentially killing many innocent people in the process.

The main plot involving Luthor's dastardly plans is just plain moronic on several levels. Seriously, after an untold number of years trying to get this project off the ground, the best story the writing team can come up with is ...a glorified land grab? Heck, I would have preferred another lame scam to steal fractions of pennies (as done in Superman III).

One potentially interesting aspect of the story is related to Lois' kid, but is mostly pushed to the background and only really brought up at the end amidst a flurry of drawn-out endings. Singer has apparently let earlier success get to his head. The movie doesn't quite suffer from full-fledged Too-Many-Endings Syndrome, but clearly exhibits First Stage Peter Jackson Disorder. And despite the drawn out ending, at almost no point in the last act does anyone ask the requisite "hey, where's Clark?" to try to reflect the absurdity that he is always missing when Superman t is around. Perhaps a small point, but really one of many that quickly adds up.

The special effects are good of course - they better be for the immense budget that Warner Bros. put up - but other than flying around, stopping a few things from falling to the ground, and the ridiculous land masses popping out of the ocean, there aren't many "money shots" that you would expect from such a blockbuster. Lastly, the acting is nothing compared to the first Superman movies which, despite their occasional cheesiness, were fine films. Most importantly, Routh is okay I suppose, but he lacks any of the charm or charisma that Reeve brought to the character, and is even lifeless in a few scenes. Spacey is ultimately just as effective as Gene Hackman was as Luthor, though he isn't quite diabolically evil enough for my taste. But the weakest link is Bosworth, who is good at smiling and that's about it. Lane's relationship with Kent is wooden and practically nonexistent; though Superman's longing for her is almost creepy, acting no different than a criminal stalker might.

By the end, I felt relieved that it was over (finally) and disappointed on many levels. If a sequel is ever going to happen, I sincerely hope that it involves Doomsday, or at least something truly new and exciting - Lex Luthor just isn't cutting it anymore. I can't believe, after so many years of trying to get this made, that the result was so limp.

The Verdict: C-.

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