BOP Daily News
September 29, 2003
The spirit of BOP News lives on in
This is So Last Week,
our pop culture week-in-review,
presented in a pleasing quiz form.
With the next installment in the Mad Max franchise stalled, Mel Gibson has
decided to get his gasoline fume quota by starring in the upcoming Warner
Bros film Under and Alone, based on the true story of an ATF undercover
agent who infiltrated the Mongols Motorcycle Club. The script will be based
on the agent's autobiography by the same name, and will be produced by
Gibson's Icon Productions. Pre-production reportedly hit a snag early on
when Gibson inexplicably insisted on filming the entire movie in ancient
Mongolian without subtitles.
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One of the drawbacks of being considered amongst the greatest authors in the
English language is that people are always tinkering with your stuff, which
brings us to reports that yet another version of Romeo and Juliet is
headed for the big screen, this one intended as a starring vehicle for Lil'
Romeo. This latest take on the Bard's classic tale of star-crossed lovers
will be titled Lil' Romeo and Lil' Juliet, and will see much of the violence
from the original play expressed using music and dance. You'd be hearing
Shakespeare spinning in his grave about now had he not already been rotating
at about Mach 4 for the last couple of decades.
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Alec Baldwin will reportedly star in a remake of a Burt Lancaster film called The
Swimmer, in which Burt played a middle-aged advertising exec whose journey
of self-discovery leads him to swim home through every backyard pool in his
neighborhood. Producers of the remake say they'll stay faithful to the
original, which seems kind of pointless since the three people who saw the
'68 film are likely all gone from this plane of existence. However, the
producers do plan on moving the location from Long Island to Connecticut, which is obviously just a crash grab for the producers. Seriously, who would set a film in Long Island when it can be set in Connecticut?
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In a long overdue move, Donald Bellisario has agreed to produce a big-screen update of the classic 1980's TV detective series, Magnum P.I. Uber-producer Brian Glazer's gain is the loss of all other studios, as this story is one of the most natural TV-to-movie conversions in recent memory. Telling the story of former Naval officer Thomas Magnum's adventures house-sitting as head of security for absentee billionaire Robin Masters, the show attained an unusual amount of celebrity for the largely unknown soap opera actor cast in the leading role, Tom Selleck. The actor cast in this role will celebrate a similar amount of immediate attention. BOP celebrates the greenlight of one of our favorite TV shows by putting on a floral print shirt and hitting on a ton of hot Polynesian women.
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"The answer is yes. Fight for me, you get to kill the English"
"Excellent!"
Box Office Prophets offers quality, reliable news about the entertainment industry. BOP is also entertaining. To that end, please be advised that some content in this column is intended to be humorous and should not be considered factual.
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