BOP Daily News
November 13, 2003
The spirit of BOP News lives on in
This is So Last Week,
our pop culture week-in-review,
presented in a pleasing quiz form.
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Uh-oh. There are some people you just shouldn’t upset, and Christopher Lee be one of them. The veteran star of many a Hammer horror film is said to be fuming after discovering Internet reports claiming all his scenes had been cut from the last film of the Lord of the Rings trilogy. Lee, who portrayed Saruman in the first two films - and thought he was also in the third film - has vowed to boycott all the premieres on learning this distressing bit of news. Lee said he only spoke out because he’d only just heard that the reports were all over the Internet; otherwise, he never would have known, nor would he have said anything about the film that might reveal something about the actual production. But according to Lee, “Someone has talked and it certainly wasn't me.” As to why his scenes had been cut, Lee reportedly referred people to Peter Jackson and New Line, as he was in the dark as to what had happened. Lee also declined to comment further, citing the confidentiality agreement he had signed and saying, “I honor my word." Putting aside the fact for the moment that we’re pretty sure eliminating Christopher Lee from the final film sort of buggers the plot, at least from a fan boy's standpoint, if the reports are true, we’d advise Jackson and Company to put things right with the venerable star. Otherwise, given all the tricks Lee likely learned from his myriad horror roles over the years, they’d best be prepared for some wicked retribution.
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And for those of you worried that the Lord of the Rings is coming to its filmic end but your thirst for tales about quests for mythic rings remains unslaked can rest easy with reports that a movie is being planned based on Wagner’s Ring cycle. The project, cleverly titled The Ring, will star Kristanna Loken, Benno Furmann and Alicia Witt, and will reportedly borrow from LotR as well as the Ring cycle. The tale of gods, mortals, dragons and dwarves all vying for the Ring of the Nibelung will also star Julian Sands and Max von Sydow and follow the adventures of Siegfried the heroic mortal and Brunhilde the Valkyrie as they battle the forces of evil and dare to embark on a forbidden love. No word on how many films are planned based on the four operas in Wagner’s Ring cycle, but if you think we’re going to do a joke about it not being over until the fat lady sings...
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Apparently The WB has decided to take a page from its film studio namesake’s playbook and plunder the past. The network is reportedly working to revive the ‘60s Gothic soap opera Dark Shadows. The WB has wisely teamed up with the show’s creator, Dan Curtis, to produce this latest incarnation of the beleaguered Collins family, whose lineage includes a vampire, a werewolf, witch’s curses, assorted ghosts, and a family estate with rooms leading to the past and alternate timelines. No details were available concerning the specifics of this visit to Collinwood, but if the deal is sealed, the series would reportedly debut in the 2004-2005 season. Should the new Dark Shadows hit the air, The WB is already planning a sweeps crossover stunt by having the Collins family hire a certain LA law firm to handle its West Coast interests.
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National Lampoon has decided to have another go at films with a comedy called National Lampoon’s Lady Killers. The film focuses on a pair of young men down on their luck who court two elderly sisters, with an eye towards ultimately owning the sisters’ Beverly Hills estate and given the title, they’re likely not going to wait for nature to take its course. But as is often the case in films such as this, the sisters have plans of their own, and hilarity will, hopefully, ensue. National Lampoon is touting the film as being both “hysterical” and “smart”, and a mix of “broad slapstick and witty satire”. Believe us when we say those are phrases you never want to see paired in describing a film. National Lampoon is also claiming amazing reaction to its test screenings, which is generally another bad sign when discussing a comedy. Now all we need is for the PR folks to tell us the film is “a heartwarming comedy” that “breaks new comedic ground” and the Warning Signs That This Film Will Suck list will be complete.
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Terry Gilliam has a film about the Brothers Grimm in production, and in true Gilliam fashion, the writers of beloved fairy tales are not being portrayed as one would expect. In Gilliam’s take, Jacob and Wilhelm Grimm were actually 19th century con-men who duped folks into paying them to rid villages and estates of evil creatures that were actually creations of the brothers’ own fertile imaginations. The tables are turned, however, when the Brothers Grimm are hired to take on an actual foul being, which sends the siblings on a wild adventure. Rumors that the malevolent critter the Brothers Grimm must defeat will be portrayed by the scripter of Matrix Revolutions could not be confirmed at press time.
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"Fat, drunk, and stupid is no way to go through life, son."
Box Office Prophets offers quality, reliable news about the entertainment industry. BOP is also entertaining. To that end, please be advised that some content in this column is intended to be humorous and should not be considered factual.
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