BOP Daily News
March 15, 2006
The spirit of BOP News lives on in
This is So Last Week,
our pop culture week-in-review,
presented in a pleasing quiz form.
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Diners at trendy Manhattan eatery Fiamma who were fascinated recently by a waitress they felt bore a certain resemblance to Catherine Zeta-Jones will likely be surprised to learn they were, in fact, waited on by the Welsh beauty herself. No, Michael Douglas didn’t gamble away all their money, forcing Zeta-Jones to take whatever work she can get just to keep food on the table for their babies. She was just following the time-honored, if somewhat hackish, Hollywood tradition of researching a role, in this case her upcoming turn as the eponymous character in Mostly Martha. The English-language remake of an Italian/German joint venture - because apparently Hollywood really has run out of original ideas - follows the story of an obsessive chef and restaurateur whose disciplined, cooking-centric life is disrupted when she is left to care for her eight-year-old niece after Martha's sister is killed in a car crash. According to coworkers at Fiamma, Zeta-Jones’ job proficiency is what led the clientele to believe they had simply come upon a woman who bore a striking resemblance to the Oscar winner, rather than realize they were being waited on by the real McCoy. Michael White, who was Zeta-Jones’ supervisor during her time in Fiamma, was reportedly quite impressed with her skills, commenting on how much time she spent in the kitchen doing such routine prep work as chopping and sautéing things. White added “[Zeta-Jones] is a great garnisher, drizzling oil and balsamic on plates. She does a nice job.” Well, performers are advised to have something to fall back on if the whole acting thing doesn’t work out, so if hubby Michael ever does develop a gambling habit or some mad inventor goes the Max Headroom route and creates believable digital performers, Zeta-Jones will at least have a marketable skill. Instead of that other time-honored tradition, that is.
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George Lucas has been making science fiction films for so long, it seems he now believes he can predict the future. According to the Star Wars creator, the age of the blockbuster is about to come to an end, and Hollywood will soon start making nothing but smaller-budget, indie-type films. He apparently bases this opinion on two things: the low-budget status of the most recent crop of Best Picture nominees, and the relative box office failure of King Kong. Lucas feels that big-budget films can no longer be profitable, thus sounding the death-knell for the mega-blockbuster and leading moviemaking down the art pathway and away from the business end. Lucas even provides a timetable for his vision, predicting that by 2025, “the average movie will cost only $15 million.” Well, if the multi-million-dollar-budget “event” films are truly dying, we’ve got a pretty good idea who helped kill them, don’t we, Mr Stuff-the-Frame-With-Special-
Effects-Hoping-to-Obscure-the-Lack-of-Plot-Like-People-Hang-a-Picture-on-a-
Wall-to-Hide-a-Hole?
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Dina Lohan, Lindsay Lohan’s mother, has given public voice to her concern over her daughter’s cigarette smoking, worried that the 19-year-old train-wreck...um, we mean actress, will end up killing herself if she doesn’t stop. Seems Lindsay has asthma, and Mother Lohan has had no success in convincing her rebellious offspring to quit before Lindsay has another major asthma attack like the one that landed her in a Florida hospital back in January. Dina was recently quoted as saying she cried when she last begged Lindsay to stop smoking but she felt her entreaties fell on deaf ears precisely because she is Lindsay’s mother, rhetorically querying, “Did you listen to your mother at 19?” Um, Mrs Lohan? We hate to break the news to you, but since you must’ve missed all the reports, we’re constrained to point out that given all the ways in which Lindsay is practically begging the Grim Reaper to come and get her, smoking cigarettes is about 147th on the list, asthma or not.
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Conventional wisdom holds that in the spring, a young man’s fancy lightly turns to thoughts of love. Apparently an old man’s fancy also turns to thoughts of love, albeit somewhat less lightly. In Touch magazine recently reported on a romantic rendezvous over coffee and pastries in Tinseltown between longtime sweethearts Calista Flockhart and Harrison Ford. Seems Ford decided it was time to take the next step in their relationship, and came up with the rather lovely idea of proposing to his intended by putting a two-carat diamond engagement ring from famed jeweler Tiffany’s in a bakery bag so that Flockhart would find it when she reached in for a croissant. Flockhart’s publicists, however, have rubbished the report, and we’re inclined to believe them, because really, Calista Flockhart eating? Besides, it’s better for all concerned the story isn't true; after all, a two-carat ring is pretty heavy. Flockhart probably wouldn’t be able to carry such a huge gemstone around without listing decidedly to port.
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"I want you to find happiness and stop having fun."
Previous edition's quote: The Empire Strikes Back
Box Office Prophets offers quality, reliable news about the entertainment industry. BOP is also entertaining. To that end, please be advised that some content in this column is intended to be humorous and should not be considered factual.
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