BOP Daily News
March 30, 2005
The spirit of BOP News lives on in
This is So Last Week,
our pop culture week-in-review,
presented in a pleasing quiz form.
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Forget J. R. Who shot Brad Pitt? Was it Ocean's Twelve love interest Catherine Zeta-Jones? Embittered soon-to-be ex-wife Jennifer Aniston? Scorned whackjob Angelina Jolie? If you want to find out the answer, you will have to wait until 2006 when Dallas: The Movie hits the bigscreen. Zeta-Jones and Pitt are among the big names rumored to star in the bigscreen adaptation of the #1 show from the 1970s. BOP suspects it was Aniston in the observatory with the candlestick. She probably caught him in the act with Jolie and she already had the candlestick from when was doing....other stuff with Mark Wahlberg's cousin.
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If M. Night Shyamalan wants to be the next Hitchcock, he first needs a Tippi Hedren before he can unleash the birds. Perhaps knowing this, Shyamalan has selected an actress to become his source of fixation. Bryce Dallas Howard has been lined up to once again frontline the creep-master's next project, Lady in the Water. The bad news for Ron Howard's daughter is that she will experience a significant downgrade when it comes to her leading man. Out is hunky Joaquin Phoenix and in is preternaturally aged baldy Paul Giamatti. Mr. Sideways plays a building superintendent who discovers a gorgeous sea nymph lives at the apartment pool. The shocking Shyamalan twist in this movie must be that Howard gives Giamatti the time of day.
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The P2P showdown has reached its final stages. Music industry attorneys faced off against their Grokster counterparts (who are financed by BOP hero Mark Cuban). The argument involves the idea of sweat-of-brow combined with the theory of technology-based intellectual property. The prize is the price tag on the development cycle. RIAA lawyers are arguing all peer-to-peer technology is designed for unlawful purposes. "Copyright infringement is the only use" for the Grokster technology according to plaintiffs' attorney Donald B. Verrilli Jr. Conversely, the defendents believe that the upholding of the Sony Betamax ruling of 1984 protects their right to create such software. For his part, Cuban (rightly) believes that overturning said ruling would largely take the power of research and development and place it squarely in the hands of giant conglomerates. They would effectively have the authority to squash any future technologies they feel might in any way threaten their intellectual property. BOP doesn't have an opinion on the subject unless our ability to download voluminous amounts of Internet porn is threatened. But if it is, we are strapping on some dynamite and heading to town square.
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Gong Li's comeback continues to be the most impressive one since Aerosmith. The Chinese actress became a critical darling for her work in such heady fare as Farewell My Concubine and Raise the Red Lantern. Then, she largely disappeared from the public eye for an extended period. This was unfortunate in that North American audiences attained a deeper appreciation for Asian cinema during a time when one of its most accomplished actresses was on hiatus. Gong Li is back in a big way now, though. Already filming expected end-of-year awards contender Memoirs of a Geisha, the actress has now been cast in two upcoming blockbuster projects. Michael Mann himself singled her out for a key role in the upcoming Miami Vice adaptation. Now comes word that she will also play Hannibal Lecter's mentor in Behind the Mask, another Lecter prequel. BOP looks forward to seeing the concubine eaten alive while Jan Hammer music loudly plays in the background. PS: Gong Li's agent deserves a raise.
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"Sue Ellen, you're a drunk, a tramp, and an unfit mother. "
Previous edition's quote: Sports Night
Box Office Prophets offers quality, reliable news about the entertainment industry. BOP is also entertaining. To that end, please be advised that some content in this column is intended to be humorous and should not be considered factual.
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