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BOP Daily NewsAugust 12, 2004The spirit of BOP News lives on in
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| Former comedienne Joan Rivers - sorry; make that former E! employee Joan Rivers - shocked her audience during a recent New York performance when she made alleged jokes about the recent reports of terrorist plots against major financial institutions. The red carpet terror, who will now annoy celebrities at award shows for the TV Guide Channel, told a stunned audience during her weekly show at chi-chi Manhattan nightspot Fez that she hoped the terrorists destroyed the Citigroup building because it was "so ugly" and stated she'd help them "load (the bombs) in". Then ignoring the noises of shock and disgust from her audience, Rivers continued her diatribe by launching into a discussion of why Jewish women would never be terrorists, including a particularly tasteless joke about a Jewish woman not putting a bomb in a Gucci bag "after all the men she f**ked to get it." Rivers later defended her "jokes" by explaining the only way through the current "horrible reality" was through humor, stating, "You have to laugh about it." While we here at BOP firmly support the First Amendment, if the result of this exercise in bad taste means we never have to hear from Joan "When Plastic Surgery Goes Horribly Wrong" Rivers again, it gets a big thumb's up from us. |
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And in semi-related news, Rivers' former employer is apparently desperate to replace her and her nasty little daughter on the red-carpet patrol. Reports are surfacing that E! has gone so far as to ask A-list celebrities such as Catherine Zeta-Jones and Nicole Kidman if they'd like a turn at making idiots of themselves on the red carpet which, having actual careers, both the ladies declined to do. According to sources, E! needs to find replacements for the Rivers before the Emmys in September; the sources say E! wants "someone so good" everyone will "forget" about Rivers. A word to the wise there, E!: pretty much anyone who can correctly identify celebrities and knows whether or not they've ever won one of the awards in question will make viewers forget about the Tiresome Twosome in a nanosecond. |
| Freshly-minted action hero Matt Damon made a real-life foray into the rescuing business when he came across a young woman who had collapsed on a Hollywood street. Damon was jogging when he came across the woman sprawled on the pavement unconscious. Quick-thinking Damon sprinkled water from his sports bottle onto the lady's face and hands to revive her, and discovered she had fainted due to dehydration and heat exhaustion. Matt then gallantly stayed with the young woman until her friend arrived to assist her home, and even graciously posted for photos and signed autographs during the wait. Fox, UPN and TNT are now in a ferocious bidding war for TV movie rights to the young lady's story, tentatively titled "Rescue in Hollywood". |
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"Better to be king for a night than a schmuck for a lifetime."
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Box Office Prophets offers quality, reliable news about the entertainment industry. BOP is also entertaining. To that end, please be advised that some content in this column is intended to be humorous and should not be considered factual.
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Sunday, April 28, 2024
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