This Weekend, Watch This

A comparison for the new releases for July 24-26, 2015

By Curt David

July 24, 2015

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New movies are released into theaters every weekend. How do you decide which movie to watch? I’ll save you the hassle of researching every movie by comparing the new releases for each weekend in this column. Then, I’ll tell you which movie you should watch in the theaters.

For the weekend of July 24th, the new movies in wide release are Paper Towns, Pixels, and Southpaw.






Paper TownsPixelsSouthpawWINNER
(1 point per category)
Clearest TitleDefinition: A John Green novel. Definition: A small area on a display screenDefinition: A left-handed boxerPaper Towns will win the recognizability point
Best Genre
and Rating
Drama/Romance
Rated PG-13 for some language, drinking, sexuality and partial nudity - all involving teens
Comedy/Action
Rated PG-13 for some language and suggestive comments
Sports/Drama
Rated R for language throughout, and some violence
Three different genres for the most part. 1/3 point each.
Best Plot
(in haiku form)
High school boy likes girl
Has fun. Then she goes missing
He has to find her
Aliens attack
With Pac-Man and arcade games
Team has to fight back
Boxer suspended
Has to train. Get life on track.
Then comeback story
Alien Pac-Man will win for the best plot.
Best Trailer PROS: Definitely is a teenage romance movie, but it seems watchable by us old folks, too
CONS: Same as the pro
PROS: Lots of 1980 arcade references, looks like good clean fun
CONS: May not be Oscar worthy
PROS: Powerhouse acting and it’s an inspirational sports drama
CONS: Rocky may be better
None of the trailers super did it for me. 1/3 point each.
Coolest Lead ActorNat Wolff from Fault in our StarsAdam Sandler from a ton of moviesJake Gyllenhaal from The Day After Tomorrow and October SkyAdam and Jake can split this point.
Best CastI don’t recognize the other folks yetKevin James (Hitch), Michelle Monaghan (Gone Baby Gone), Peter Dinklage (Game of Thrones), Josh Gad (Olaf from Frozen!), and a ton moreRachel McAdams (The Notebook) and Forest Whitaker (The Butler)Pixels wins this point.
Best Street Cred
For the Production
Director Jake Schreier also directed Robot & Frank. (And the movie is based on the book by The Fault in Our Stars author)Director Chris Columbus also directed Home Alone, Mrs. Doubtfire, and Harry Potter 1 and 2. Director Antoine Fuqua also directed Training Day and King Arthur. And Chris and Antoine can win this point.




So out of a maximum of 7 points per movie, Pixels scores 3 and 2/3 points (and a gold star), and Southpaw and Paper Towns each score 1 and 2/3 points.

You may interpret this column for your own movie preferences. For example, if you watched A Fault in our Stars, feel free to watch Paper Towns. However, if you are still on the fence, please read the following conclusions from the scientific data gathered in this column.

Conclusion 1: On paper, Pixels is the best movie to watch this weekend.
Conclusion 2: Each week I give a gold star to the movie with the best tagline. This weekend Pixels’ “Game On,” beats out Paper Towns’ “Get Lost. Get Found,” and definitely beats out Southpaw’s “Believe in Hope.”
Conclusion 3: Mrs. Doubtfire, Home Alone, and Harry Potter 1 and 2 were great movies. Well done, Chris.




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