Elf Off the Shelf: Days 14-25

By Daron Aldridge

December 25, 2014

For the last few years the Elf on the Shelf phenomenon has captured the attention of kids everywhere. Here's how it works (for the uninitiated): Your family buys the Elf on the Shelf and all through December, he moves around the house after the kids go to bed. He serves always as the eyes and ears of Santa, and then flies home to the North Pole every night to report. He's a Christmas surveillance drone, if you will.

Well, it appears that in his downtime, the elf has left the confines of homes across the world and ended up in well-known movie posters. Simply, he is now an Elf Off the Shelf.
Does your cap always naturally stand up like that?

Day 14: The Curious Case of this Elf is whether he chose this movie to be close to Cate Blanchett or to just be Brad Pitt. The sly look in his eyes likely means both.
Do elves like fava beans?

Day 15: This is pretty fitting. "Clarice Starling" legitimately sounds like an elfin name.
Soon to be appearing on The Amazing Race.

Day 16: As a nod to the real-life Soul Surfer Bethany Hamilton making it to the final leg of this season of The Amazing Race, the Elf decides to trade the snow for the warmer climate.

I don't like to think how De Niro's going to react to this.

Day 17: It's understandable that the Elf would take a break from the chilly North Pole in a movie called Heat but he might be hanging out with the wrong element in sunny L.A.
They're probably trying to figure out glass doors.

Day 18: Before Harry and Lloyd or Wayne and Garth, we had Bill and Ted. I wonder if the Elf would make this 'Journey' less 'Bogus.'
Is it safe to give an elf a gun?

Day 19: Of course, the Elf had only one character from the Captain America sequel that he could embody: The Winter Solider. He even modified the shoulder insignia to fit his style.
Sometimes elves have to get away and think about how boring some movies can be.

Day 20: Maybe the Elf could make The English Patient better for folks like Seinfeld's Elaine (and my own dear wife, Leslie).
The elf is weaponized this holiday season.

Day 21: The Elf takes on the seminal Native American hero and he would definitely own the original name for the character - Natty Bumppo - over the more-actiony Hawkeye.
Is he biting her neck?

Day 22: Friendly advice to the Elf - When Rose tells you that she'll never let go, she just means it figuratively and not literally. Upside: You are probably more used to the icy waters.
Whip it good!

Day 23: Raiders of the Lost Elf. "Don't look at the elf, no matter what happens!"
Elven reality shows are an idea whose time has come.

Day 24: This Christmas Eve is a nice culmination of my silly past time. The "pixels" from this Truelf Show poster are my posters from the last three Decembers of Elf movie adventures.
Merry Christmas! Day 25: The Elf was busy last night and decided to give you a Christmas Day triple feature (twice as the big man himself and also as Ralphie). Merry Christmas to you all.



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