Viking Night: Stanley Film Festival II

Stanley Night Fever, 2014 Edition

By Bruce Hall

April 29, 2014

Is this picture giving anyone else an Addams Family theme song earworm?

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If that’s not enough praise, let me tell you that Waititi was standing outside when we left, and I thought briefly about letting him know what a great time I had. Then I realized that my thoughts might dirty him and make him less funny. I determined my input was not needed, and I moved on. If anyone can condense that into useful DVD copy, you have my permission to use it.

Blood Glacier

If you’re going to make a scary movie, one of the first things you need to come up with is an awesome title. Creative use of the word “blood” is always a plus, and the creators of Blood Glacier have done us one better by using it to modify one of nature's most majestically boring spectacles. Sure, it sounds a little cheesy. But if you’re not interested in what a Blood Glacier looks like, I’m not even sure why you're still reading. Austrian Director Marvin Kren wisely detected the non-awesomeness of his original title - “The Station” - and acted accordingly. Giving your monster movie the title to a Gwyneth Paltrow movie is not what puts butts in seats.




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But the user-facing edge of a kick ass title is that now, people are going to expect a kick ass story. And in that regard, Blood Glacier is a mixed bag. The film opens on title cards declaring that the world climate has collapsed, and the survival of humanity is at stake. Antarctica has completely melted, the Northern glaciers are retreating, seas are rising and naturally, cats and dogs are living together. But somewhere in the German Alps, scientists at a remote climate station are studying ways to reverse the damage. And among them is a lowly technician named Janek (Gerhard Liebmann), a grizzled, middle aged sourpuss who – like all great heroes - is running from something. So he loves his solitude, his heavy metal, his moonshine and his dog, Tinni (short for Tinnitus, which he no doubt got after hearing an awesome title like Blood Glacier).

With Janek are a group of climate scientists, their personalities covering a range of horror tropes: Brilliant Scientist, Computer Genius, Mr. Practical, and of course, Squirrely Guy Who Eventually Turns on Everyone Before Dying an Ironic Death. They're preparing for the arrival of a key government minister, whose approval is needed for continued funding. Everyone is already on edge when Janek, on routine field maintenance, discovers an unusual glacier colored red by a mysterious substance. The color is later found to come from a new kind of microbe, one that turns out to have a very unfortunate effect on animal life. A series of violent encounters with the newly altered wildlife confirms this, meaning the Minister is in danger when she comes. And did I mention that an old flame of Janek's is the Minister's escort?


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