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6) John - I believe that a bit of Mr. Tesar’s natural arrogance crept in during his battle with Stefan. He also allowed Stefan to get in his head about the quality of the product as well as the quality of the opponent. The end result was that John politicked too much and prepared too little. The miscalculation with the amount of chorizo could be the early warning signal for an impending implosion. Alternately, it could be a quickly forgotten mistake if John is back on his game this week.

7) Joshua - Yes, Joshua won last week but he is the lowest ranked of the winners and slotted behind one of the losers for a very good reason. Joshua defeated his friend, Danyele, in a heads up battle. She was then eliminated from Top Chef for preparing the worst dish. We cannot determine the quality of Joshua’s dish since all we know for certain is that it was better than the worst one last week. As such, I have bumped him up two spots but reserve the right to drop him back down again if he sucks this week. The other thought I have Joshua is that his popularity on Bravo probably spiked thanks to that image as The Super-Gay Denim Cowboy High School Wrestling Champion. Congrats on being the Bravo masturbatory fantasy of the week, Joshua!

8) Micah - Micah was given some respect by Sheldon, someone I believe knows how to evaluate the talent of a chef. I also believe (with no tangible means to prove it) that Micah prepared the best of the losing dishes. Yes, he did also finish in the bottom trio during the Quickfire challenge but I read nothing into it. After all, that was a ridiculous exercise that offered little demonstration of natural cooking skill. Take away a chef’s frying pan and you have turned them into a baker.

9) Bart - I give Sir Bart bonus points for dropping an F-bomb on John Tesar. Presuming that nice guys finish last, it is best to fight fire with fire when an opponent is being a prick. And being a prick is John Tesar’s true calling in life. Still, the only consistent aspect of Bart’s tenure on Top Chef is that he continue to fall somewhere between the middle of the pack and the bottom. Since the pack has thinned and most of the people he could beat are gone, Bart’s situation has become precarious. He seems like a talented chef as well as an absurdly decent man. The Top Chef competition does not mesh well with his skill set, for whatever reason.

10) Josie - Josie was going to do well on Top Chef…but then she got high. Seriously, why is she even here? Did a Voltaggio brother drop out at the last instant or something? Who had Josie on the list of Players We Cannot Wait to Have Back on the Show? I mean, someone must have or she wouldn’t be here yet I cannot escape the feeling that somebody else dropped out at the last minute. The only reason why we are being subjected to another season of Josie is that she was the only previous contestant who had a free month where she could drop everything to fly to Seattle. She clearly is not on the show due to her cooking skill…or her cooking demo skill, for that matter. Last week’s circus at Josie’s booth is one of the strangest moments ever on Top Chef.

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